Can anyone hear me?

I am so afraid. 

I don't know what to do.

 I want to scream.

I want to cry out loud.

I want to die.

This overwhelming feelings are haunting me again.

Hopelessness.

Desperate.

Fear.

I am so lost.

I am so hurt.

I am in so much pain right now.

But it feels like no one cares.

Why can't anyone see the pain in my eyes whenever i fake a smile?

Why can't anyone hear my my silent cry whenever I fake a laugh?

Why isn't there anyone who ask me if I am still alright?

because honestly...

I am far from being okay..

I feel like dying

I need someone to talk to..

but I am so afraid..

I am so scared that they will not understand

You know what is scarier than being ignored and left out???

It is the feeling when you tried to tell others what 

you really feel

and yet, they doesn't seem to care 

they said they understand you and yet

you will see their judging eyes looking at you

pretending to comfort you but at the back of their minds they are thinking much more than what you have told them

why is it so hard loving people?

why can't i just received as much as i have given?

i know i should not think this way..

i know the answers to my questions 

but right now.. i'm too worn out to even think

I am so tired.

I am so hurt.

to you who is reading this right now..

i hope you can understand

I am just human..

I am not always kind..

I am not always happy..

I am not miss perfect..

I am only a human..