I read it somewhere long back that "Death isn't poetic", I couldn't get my head around it, because I wrote about sadness and heartbreak and I always had a way with words to let my feelings and pain drain into oblivion, until the day I got the sermon of your death.
Since that day everytime I tried to write about you I went numb.
Everything has come back to normal at least that is what I tell myself. But when your D-day arrives, I go numb again.
Maa tells me to visit your grave and pay my respects but everytime I tell her that I will, later. She doesn't ask me now, guess she realised, I have a hard time saying goodbyes.
Sorry, I didn't visit you when you were buried, I couldn't let myself see you gone. As you always use to say, ignorance is the bliss, guess it totally is.
Your D-day has arrived again, And again mom is getting ready to visit you as always, but this times it's different. Last night when I was sitting in my room beside the window sipping my coffee from your favourite cup as usual looking up at the stars, she came to me and asked to accompany her to the cemetry and also, requested that I write something to read it to you as it has been so many years and it was your 10th "Death anniversary".
She knew how much I loved reading to you my every single write up. I guess she sensed my trouble of not letting myself open up with my pain and ability to put it in words, so here I am, reading this to you as per mom's request, this heartfelt letter.
It took me tons of coffee and thousands of paper to figure out what to write and most importantly how to write and after so much thought process and caffeine intake I could only come up with this. Don't get upset with me for not writing you a poem or a prose, I know you will say but you are a poet who dwells in sadness to write about the pain, but you see, life isn't fair to have taken you away from me and also that death isn't poetic and that is the biggest irony of our story , that I am a poet, who couldn't write my love, a melancholic prose or a poem and that is one saddest part of my life I will always frown upon.
Hope you are doing well on the other side. I have been doing fine.
Miss me, till I come and visit you again, hopefully with a poem not filled with pain.
Story