It was like a waterfall, the way Yana fell in love. Like the flow of a river, it wasn’t a new experience, it was smooth and predictable, and long awaited. Once it reached the cliff, it all fell down, crashing and crashing into the water as passionate and violent below to only continue on again.
Yana had fallen for many men before, and women if she was honest. Some had batted her an eye, some had strike up conversations, some never noticed her. Nonetheless, Yana still fell in love. That time with a particular man, a man of unconscious low self-esteem, a man of love in plentiful, a man of shyness and bravery that never cease to confused and amazed Yana. It all just took the mention of his name to have Yana be swept into dreamland, the name Silvio.
Like some love stories, theirs started in high school. Particularly in their sophomore year when Yana’s group of mixed genders friends called over the relatively short guy, compared to other guys, with black, curly hair that wasn’t neat and brown eyes that sang a song Yana didn’t know about. When he spoke, a joke came out and Yana knew why her friends liked Silvio. He jokingly called everyone by a predestined title based on what he knew and his judgment of them by looks. However, he hesitated as he reached Yana. All he could mustered was a smile and a, “Hello there, Madame. Who may you be?”
Yana was shy in front of the new cutie so she lowered her head and answered, “I would love to be a doctor one day.”
“Doctor Yana,” Silvio had smiled, “Nice to meet you. I am your fellow Doctor Silvio.”
And so they shared a smile and stars twinkling stare before their friends started making fun of their career choice.
That was the most intimated interaction they shared before their actual love story started. Throughout that school year, it was mostly just them sharing a friendship sandwiched in between their friends in their group of mixed genders friends.
The next school year, especially on that first day, Yana couldn’t find her friends and was panicking when Silvio called her name with a wave of his arms. He moved a spot over when she went to him and Yana took a seat next to her crush. They shared a smile and then chatters among their friends brought them away from their intimacy. Neither of them were bothered by that, however, they seemed to liked the proximity they both had. And since then, Silvio and Yana can be seen sharing a close proximity space. Although no friends want to comment on it, they all knew something was blossoming between them.
Yet, neither of them wanted to take that step into lover’s lane. Yana still held a crush on Silvio, but now that their friendship had blossomed so far, she feared for what was to happen when the lover’s lane crashed. She’ll lose that one friend she wanted in her life. It was too much to give up on. Unbeknownst to her, Silvio had the same thoughts.
Yana, however, couldn’t help but also dreamed of what that lover’s lane can offer. What would it be like to hold Silvio’s hand, and walk through the park as his lover? What would it be like to sit in a theater next to him and not be ignored as a friend? What would it be like to kiss him and not be shy of the world around them? What would it be like to share a life with Silvo and bare his children? Many parts of Yana were excited and wished for these dreams to be true. However, deep inside, many parts of Yana were scared of the expectations and realities of these dreams.
Then towards the end of their Junior year, Silvio had have enough with dreams and took a major leap of faith. He knew he was a coward for doing so but it was the best he could do before backtracking further than he could imagine. Although Silvio and Yana had flirted before, it was all in a joking tone and hinting and nothing more. So when he sent Yana that video of love, he half expected her to understand. And it did confused and frustrated Yana for a while before she too took a major leap of faith as well and asked Silvio if he liked her. His answer quickly created a summer with plenty of promises.
In an agreement, the movie was their first date, a horror movie. It interested and scared Yana, but she was comforted by the equally interested and scared Silvio. They both shared a laugh and stars twinkling stare as they ate their fast food dinner under the clear glassed night sky.
It took only three months before their first major problem arise. Being in love, they had forgotten they had priorities, particularly Silvio’s family’s priorities. Yana didn’t understand but Silvio was prohibited to love her. Even after the talk with her family, she still didn’t understand why Silvio wasn’t allowed to love her. However, that didn’t end their love story, although it did limited their ways of connecting and their proximities of intimacy.
Their only connections were technology and their faithful friends. Their friends helped shield them at school and fought for their love. When they were away from each other or cannot see each other, a text was the most they ever shared. It was enough, however. Enough to keep Silvio going and enough to keep Yana dreaming.
And then high school was ending and adult life was starting. Misfortune hit when Yana was not accepted into the same school as Silvio. Silvio was willing to change to the public university to be with Yana but Yana refused him to do so. She wanted him to keep chasing his dream. And so Silvio encouraged her to keep chasing her dreams as well. And their love stretch from feet apart to miles apart. And their dreams of sharing the same career choice bend.
The golden text kept their love anew even when differences arise. When holidays came, it was spent with them together as often as they can make it happen. Family matters and other, new and old, friendships also had taken hold in their lives. The time they could spent with each other was rather small and most were spent with other friends, but it was just enough for both of them.
There was a distant that can be felt between Silvio and Yana. Neither wanted to comment on it but both were scared of what that distant can do. Yana was particularly scared. Once she had a dream with Solvio and suddenly that dream was threatened. Silvio sense it as well, but he knew that they will survive it and didn't want to jinx himself by commenting on it. And so they lived and loved like a walk on thin ice, until summer arrived.
The hot summer brought heat to their love. During Yana’s spring semester and break, she had made friends with some bold schoolmates who encouraged her to be her inner self. With that, she brought her bold self to Silvio who welcomed her with open arms. They spent a summer of unexpected experiences that brought scorching heat and wanting of more. This renewed their love. Silvio then shared his life away to Yana, how he was given an opportunity for a full scholarship to be schooled right where Yana was. And Yana was happy for Silvio and she anticipated for their times being together to lengthened.
When the fall semester did come, Silvio didn’t complete the transaction to be in Yana’s school. Yana texted and called and she understood why.
When the holidays arrived, they got the chance to spend it more with each other than with the other people. Although only less than two years had passed since their high school life, the adult life have already changed them all so much. Their old friends didn’t have time to spend with them anymore. When Silvio’s friends from his university called him up for a holiday trip before the start of the spring semester, Yana let him go.
It wasn’t because his friends were more important. It wasn’t because she was going to be busy as well. It wasn’t because Silvio wanted it. It was because she knew, and so did Silvio, that Silvio was not the one she was going to marry.
As Silvio kissed Yana’s cheek and promised to be back early for summer break to spend more time with her, Yana just gave him a smile. She waved to him and knew deeply in her heart that summer will not come for them.
Yana’s summer did came, so did Silvio’s summer. But their summer never did arrived.