I used to love the night sky

"Cry me a river but remember to keep your feet on the bridge; don't drown yourself, my dear, I'm in good hands now," that's my Dad's last words.

"I used to love the moment when the moon takes over the sun's throne, the way it covers the city with darkness cradled with bright lights, and how it kissed my bare skin mercilessly. I used to love watching the cars and people passing by at night. I have been fond of gazing on the vast skies above filled with millions of stars. Most of all, I used to be hypnotized with the pouring rain blended with the vivid colors of city lights trapped on every car's windshield.

Not until it took the first man who loved me with all his heart - my dad. We were together that night; we dashed the road and found solace in each other's silence. In a blink of an eye, we got crashed; I passed out and woke up with this nightmare. Just like the raging clouds and lightning that cracks the night sky, my entire being shouts for answers. My heart has gone colder, and my demons roared louder than ever. I find it so unfair. Really.

After what happened that night, I can no longer see aesthetics under the night sky that would captivate my eyes. Everything turned dull. The darkness that I once found comfort with now feels like a deadly disease eating my whole system. I could no longer gaze at the stars above and wish; for they never listened to me anyway.

I used to love the things that happen during the night, but my love for it took the warmth inside me. It left me hanging with this scarred soul, it took all my hopes and happiness away," I smiled, though it hurts, as I put a period on the last sentence of what I wrote for today’s journal entry.

“Ah, the morning breeze feels so good,” I mumbled to myself as I watched the colors of the skies turned to azure. There, below the overhanging clouds, I stayed for a while to savor the delights of a new day.