Damogushi
After getting my head check and told that it was minor, but the loss of memories can be from that I was traumatized and lost it psychologically. I was assured that it would return. Then my phone rang on my way to the bus and Inami told me that Damo woke up. I raced the whole way to the hospital. Damo’s been in a coma since the accident, about a month ago.
“Damo!” I said as I opened the door to his room. I’ve visited him regularly but always see his body laying on the bed. Now he’s sitting up and Inami is feeding him some water. They all turned to look at me. Inami’s eyes shine in a way that was happy and something, shock? Yutashi’s eyes were tired and glad and something else as well. Then out of the corner of my vision, I saw two elders, Damo’s parents. However, none of them mattered because Damo’s eyes… his eyes looked colorless and confused.
I slowed to a walking pace as I huffed and puffed, tired from the run. “Hey.”
“Hey,” Yutashi said then grabbed my arm. “Let’s talk.”
“What?” I asked confused. “Why? I need to - “
“Ichi!” she said in a voice that sent chills down my spine. “Outside, now.”
“Ok…” I said, my eyes on Damo, who’s staring at me tentatively but confused.
I followed Yutashi out. We walked a couple doors away then around a corner then stopped. She turned to me, I wonder how long she stayed up, she looked so old and tired though she is only 28 years old.
“What’s wrong?” I asked. “I need to be there with Damo.”
“Need I remind you of his parent’s disapproval of you?” she asked. “You need to behave yourself.”
“So?” I said. “Damo chose me, and they know that. Why are you preventing me from seeing him too?”
“I’m not preventing you,” she said. “I’m sure you are happy he’s awake, because we all are.” Then she close in on me, “But Ichi…” I listened closely, “Damo,” she sighed, “He… has lost some memories.”
I couldn’t even say anything. She continued anyway, “When he woke up, Inami called you then turned to him calling him brother and crying happily. He just looked at her confused then at me as I walked in and said nothing. I asked him, ‘What’s wrong?’ He shook his head and asked, ‘How did I end up here?’ Then he told me he couldn’t remember anything and asked who I was, which was odd. Then he asked to call his parents, which was even more odd. When his parents arrived, he was so happy, which was the very odd. Then…” suddenly she chuckled. “He asked where Inami was. When Inami tapped on his shoulder, he was suddenly confused. Somehow he lost all of his memory and is like a middle schooler again.” She burst into mini-laughters.
“That’s not funny,” I said.
“I know,” she stopped laughing then sighed loudly. “I know and I don’t know what to do. He thinks he have to go home and finish his homework, Ichika.”
I smiled a little, “Ok, maybe a little funny.”
She smack my shoulder. “He doesn't remember me.”
Suddenly it hits me, “He doesn’t remember me as well…”
“Yeah,” she looked at me. “That’s what I’m trying to tell you.”
After a couple seconds of standing there, Yutashi patted my shoulder then we walked back to Damo’s room. He’s talking to his parents and Inami now. I just went and sit in one of the visitor’s chair. At one point, Damo laughed and said he couldn’t believe that Inami grew up so fast. Inami showed him his reflection on her phone and he called himself hot. Then the doctor came in and told him the accident, the coma, and the cause of his loss of memories; a heavy blow to the head by the window.
Before leaving, the doctor beckoned Damo’s parents and they followed outside. Inami cheerfully chatted with Damo as Yutashi checked over the machines and changed a couple other things in the room.
“Who’s him?” Damo asked as he pointed at me, still sulking in one of the visitor’s chair. He have not given me any attention until now. He really has lost his memories. Now, what am I to him? We’re lovers but not, since he doesn’t remember.
“He’s…” Inami turned to Yutashi.
Yutashi then turned to me.
I looked at them both, “What?”
Damo turned to me then back to Inami, “Your boyfriend?”
Inami looked disgusted for a second then said, “Wrong! No. He’s… uh…”
Yutashi burst into laughters. “Close.”
I forced on a smile then went to him. I took his hand and said, “Your boyfriend.”
He stared at me for a little while then started laughing. “Is this one of your prank, Inami? That was funny.” Then he looked at me as he snatched his hand back. “I don’t even like guys like that.”
Yutashi burst into laughters again.
Inami looked at me, not knowing what to say.
Still having on the smile, I said, “Well, then… believe whatever you want to. We are lovers.”
“Right,” he turned to Inami for answers. “Who is this person?” If I was not here, for sure you would’ve asked, “Who is this asshole?” Because his tone sounded just like that.
“Well, he’s… he is your lover, Damo,” Inami tried to smile.
“Damo?” he questioned the nickname. Right, I forgot I was the one who gave him that nickname.
Inami went quiet. She liked the nickname too so she never questioned much about it.
Damo smiled, “I like that nickname.” That’s what he said when I gave it to him too.
“Of course,” Yutashi smiled.
“I still don’t get who you are suppose to be,” Damo said to Yutashi. Her smile disappeared. I burst out into laughter. We’re in the same boat. She turned to me and glared.
“We are your friends from high school,” Yutashi explained. “You met Ichika,” pointed at me, “then me at Raymond High. We all went to the same university as well, Morone University. We’ve known each other for a little over a decade now, rather you remember or not.”
He looked at Yutashi questioningly. Then he smiled, “How did you know Raymond was my choice of high school?”
“That’s because we met you there,” I said.
He pay me no attention and continued talking to Yutashi, “We know each other for over a decade?”
Yutashi nodded. Then pointed at me, “And him. You know him longer though.”
Damo looked at me but then turned back to look at Yutashi. “I felt like I know you longer.”
That completely threw me off. That is wrong, I met Damo first. We became friends, then a year later, after we met Yutashi and became friends with her, we started dating. How can he really not felt that about me first? Yutashi and Damo shared a decade of friendship, but he and I shared a decade of love. How?
“Ichika,” Yutashi touch my shoulder. I forced a smile on my face again.
“That’s a surprise,” I said. Damo stared at me blankly. That’s when the realization really hit. He doesn’t remember me at all. I felt a tear rolled down my cheek. I wiped it then said, “Anyway, I got to go get my med. I’ll see you guys later.”
I turned and walked out.
“Ichi - “ I heard Inami called, but Yutashi probably cut her off.
I went to lobby then sat down, despair is making it hard to walk and stand. First I can’t remember the accident memory and now the love of my life can’t remember me. He can’t remember the first time we met, hug, kiss, love. He can’t remember when he first told me “I love you” or how I responded. He can’t remember our first date, our first apartment, our first major argument, our first…
“Wait,” suddenly my thoughts is interrupted by a snips of memory, a memory that I don’t remember having. Could it be from the accident? We were arguing, really arguing. That isn’t part of our first major argument, because in that first major argument, I ran out into the dark and grab a place at Yutashi. The next day, though it was blizzarding, he came for me. This one… we are arguing but we aren’t looking at each other, we aren’t shouting, we’re silently shouting. We were… in a car.
“Ichika,” Yutashi’s voice broke my thoughts, but I know for sure now that we were arguing in the car before the accident, just not about what.
Yutashi sat next to me, “Ichika.”
I shook my head, then wiped my tears again. “I’m ok. It just hit harder than I thought.”
She sighed. Then pat my shoulder, a little too happy.
“What?” I asked as turned to her.
She smiled, “Didn’t you said that if any memory loss ever happen to Damo, that unlike Kagisa, you’ll do everything to get his memories back?”
I remembered that conversation, six months ago when Nami released her new story. We were talking about it.
“So keep your words,” she continued, “and do everything you can to get his memories back. I know you are sadden about him not remembering you two’s love. I would too if Inami forgot about me.”
I sighed. “Still not over her?”
“It takes time,” she said.
Since the day Inami entered Morone University, Yutashi fell in love. Damo and I just moved out into our own apartment. Inami was a first year, while Yutashi was a grad-student. They became friends, and Yutashi hid those feelings since as well. She had tried numerous times to get over Inami, but it’s hard when Inami always call her and depend on her so much as her best friend. I admire Yutashi’s passion and devotion.
I smiled, I shouldn’t give up just because Damo doesn’t remember me now. He will get his memories back! Rather he likes it or not. “Ok! I shouldn’t give up!”
“That’s more like the Ichika I know,” Yutashi smiled then violently pat my back. “Let’s not mentioned that again.”
“Ok,” I whispered to her. Then we laughed. So much have happened, but what could be more worst than the lost memories? I’m alive and Damo’s alive.