A lot of things have change but still here I am figuring out how can I be forgiven. I know it's been so long but this guilt is still bothering me. Am I bad? Am I not deserving for any love? Am I not deserving for "your" love?
I know that I made a mistake. I am not perfect. I am just a human being and human beings make mistakes. Why can't you forgive me? Did I really hurt you?
I don't really know what is happening that time. I thought that I already lost you. I thought that you were already gone. Because of that, I suffer in so much pain. I am depressed and worried that I almost committed suicide. But, I didn't do it because I'm still hoping that you'll come back. And when you come back, I know that you will needed me for sure.
I really don't know what what will I do without you in my life. I am used to have you beside me always. But, you run away from me. Without knowing the reason, I try to forget all the memories that we had. It is not because I never loved you but it is because of the pain that is killing me.
Months have passed but you are still nowhere to be found. I thought that I have already moved on because I already have a boyfriend that I really love so much. But then, you came back.
I was surprised and shocked when you get mad at me and call me a cheater. Why would I be? If in the first place, you are the one who got away...
All the feelings and love suddenly came back. I broke up with my boyfriend just because of believing that we still have a chance. I have loved him but not like the way I love you.
I try to find you. You are lost again. I lost you again. I'm very sorry because I didn't have enough patience for you. I was so hurt that time. I don't know that you are hurt too. Still, I'm waiting for you. Hoping that you'll come back real soon so that I can tell you I REALLY LOVE YOU.