"Okay this is what I should put." He told himself with much conviction. His fingers tapped on the keyboard almost automatically, as if the words are part of him.
"I met you at the eye of the storm..." were the letters showing up on screen. He thought it would be great to start it this way, to describe something indescribable like it is an enigma. But then he couldn't find the right words to continue.
" The sky roared thunder..."
*Backspace*
"The stars glitter in the sky..."
* Backspace*
"She is life in all its beauty..."
*Backspace*
He couldn't bring himself to complete any of the sentence he is constructing. His writing has always been defined by this constant wall, a loss for words and a confusion on which words should mix together. But this instance is on a much higher scale. There was just not enough words that exists to define her. He wasn't even sure if it is at all possible to do so.
Then an idea hit him; as fast and as accurate as lightning on a metal rod. And so, with whatever amount of resistance he still has left, he let his fingers transfer all his thoughts.
My Dear Melancholy,
You need to forgive me again. I am at a loss for words like that day when I confessed. You remember don't you? How I wanted to get eaten by the ground, and how cold your words seemed to be. You drove me crazy because I thought I didn't mean to you like you meant to me.
"You're just confused. You find comfort in me; that's why you are saying those words right now."
I remember that day without much fondness. There I was offering my heart; as bare as could be and you rejected it. But I didn't hate you, because that was the kind of outcome I expected. I confessed knowing I would be rejected, and was happy because you didn't place any wall between us after what happened.
I'm sorry. This letter is supposed to make your heart skip a beat. But, the words really don't wish to cooperate. I'm as lost as those moments when my eyes meet your gaze. I am caught; wrapped in your being...and sucked in by your universe.
You have no idea how much I am amazed. The way your air leaves me breathless and how I want to watch your every move like a state of trance. I have fallen for you long ago, and I still keep falling until this day, until this moment. I don't understand how that is even possible. I do not understand how I could fall this way; like you are a bottomless spiral that keeps me in the middle.
I am lost in your eyes, and caught in your being. I am enchanted by your voice, like the an adventurer caught by the melody of sirens.
I am in love with you and, you have told me the same. Dearest, you have no idea how my heart wanted to burst when you told me this. When the day came that everything came to light, it felt like dreams swapped with reality. My heart wished to detonate a hundred times over. The feelings I've burried now surface again and, instead of haunting me, they embrace me with such warmth because now they found an owner. My heart is now safely and comfortably placed in a person who is willing to keep it.
Dear, you will always and forever be the monochrome in my world of colors. When everything has lost life and it is depth that can save me, you would be there to save me through and through. You would carry that blankness in your face and see me as I really am. And from the deepest part of my universe I'll admit this boldly. My dear melancholy...
I love you.