Since We're Not

• It has been a really long time since we haven't been "us"
• I have finally realised that I'm actually gonna be fine.
  
• After an endless circle of self loath,
• I think spring has finally come to melt the cold you left.
• I have stopped knocking on the door I know,
• Is never gonna be answered.
• I have finally put the ice cream back in the freezer,
• which I let melt in hope of your return.
• I no longer need you to eat my ice cream with.. 
• You are the Sun to my Moon.
• No longer because you gave me hope when I couldn't find it.
• But because you have to set, in order for me to rise.
• All this time I spent loathing myself for what I did to you.
• And you just blindly used it for sympathy.
• Thank you, for showing me exactly what I don't need.
• I don't need the love of someone who doesn't believe in mine.
• You are of the fire which gave me warmth,
• But burnt out the moment it snowed.
• I would have waited for you too, you know.
• For you, a thousand times over.
• But you, my love, don't deserve a single little bit of it.
• Now, I don't hate you love.
• I couldn't even if I tried. Even if I wanted to.
• But taking responsibility for your life is like flying.
• You feel inevitable, free and empowered.
• I was a Magnificent Bird, whereas you; A mere Land Animal.
• If me carrying the mountain of guilt over my shoulders,
• Keeps you in shade forever, then so be it.
• But I won't have you standing there not even accrediting my pain.
• I can't just stand there crying the invisible tears,
• Just because you hate me too much to come and help.
• I will no longer let you caress my soul to smoothen yourself.
• I will no more burn in an everlasting fire,
• Just so you keep taking the credit of lighting it.
• I will no longer be the thief who used to steal your memories from the past.
• I will not have the urge to wish you a happy birthday.
• I will no longer ponder on whether it was too late to love you.
• Because even if it was, it's okay.
• I can't let you keep my heart forever, love.
• For it is me, that it needs to beat for.
• I can't let you keep all my love anymore.
• For I might have, by mistake, given you my share of it.
• I will no longer be your sob story.
• My story is tired of being shoved by you.
• It needs a new Protagonist.
• I recently decided to fill the vacancy myself.
• But believe me love, you will never find anyone,
• Who would willingly dig a hole in their soul, 
• Just to treasure safely; a part of you.
• Who would fight an inner War, every day,
• Just to win the honour of loving you.
• I would have gracefully done that for the rest of my life. But.
• For you, not once more, ever.

~Thank you for staying, but you can leave now.