i have always hated to be with you
you don't know what it's like to suppress a demonic feeling inside your chest
or to want to something that is already in front of me but can never be mine
i hate it
i hate it when you get too close that i can smell the shampoo in your hair and i have to hold back hugging you
i hated it when i told you that i liked you but only as friends
i hate it when every time i see your pretty face glowing against the sunlight
i hate to see you differently even though you're not one of the prettiest girl i have ever seen
i hate myself when i think about a vivid vision of you every time i close my eyes at night
i hate myself for not having the courage to tell you the real version of my feelings