Tiny droplets of rain touch my feet as I stretch my leg from the shelter under which I am sitting.
At first it was 1, 2, 3 drops and then suddenly it was 5 drops at a time.
The urge to touch them pulled me and I ended up standing in the rain.
Each droplet that fell on me kindled my old memories and my hope filled thoughts of the future. I closed my eyes and my thoughts filled my mind.
My life is about the flow,
I never asked for anything, everything happens to me in a flow, I go with the flow too. That’s how my heart never gets broken too much as I don’t expect something to happen.
My mom on the other side (like every other mom) always expects the best for me.
Everytime there is a turning point in my life my mom gets broken for her expectation but then her broken pieces are fixed back completely removing the hurt she felt.
HOPE 1
Mom used to say that she had cried a lot because she could not join me in the school which she had wanted me to join. She was broken but her sorrows went away as I got into a wonderful school than she expected. Both me and my mom enjoyed my school days till my 10th grade.
She said to me even though she expected something and it didn't happen she did not lose her HOPE.
The hope gave her and me the unexpected joy.
HOPE 2
11th and 12th grades went so fast. Like how people say 12th grade decides a person’s future, the same thing happened to me too.
Even though I don’t want to expect more, others'
expectations grew on me.
My results were not so satisfying. Mom was worried, but this time I did not lose my hope.
Every 12th grade student has dreams about their future college days, but I did not have anything like that.
I entered college and the reality of my college days were like a dream.
First three years of engineering in the Biotech department went so happily. Fourth year was when I really worked hard. I had to do a practical project and write a thesis on the same. My field of project was Microbiology. One of the subjects
that I liked the most.
I and my friends worked as a team. The five of us enjoyed the initial days, but as days went we did not get the results we expected. Our microorganisms cultured plates got contaminated and we had to re-do everything. Contamination made our work hell. Still I did not lose my hope and worked till the end. The end results did not satisfy me, but that’s what happens in research right? We did not have much time to
again start our research from scratch. So we presented our thesis with whatever results we got. My hope made me happy this time too. The external to whom we presented our work gave us a thumbs up and we got an A .
HOPE 3
I never thought of leaving my comfort zone to do
something. All the years until my final year of college it was inside my comfort zone.
“All progress takes place outside the comfort zone”, as the quote says, I had to go work in another state.
From Tamil Nadu I went to work at Bangalore. For me everything was so different, language, culture,
food….everything!
Hope was the only thing that I had when I entered the office where I was going to work. I met the most beautiful people at heart and their contribution towards the company made me gasp.
It’s been two years with them and I still now gasp at them. I thought I would never get a job like this, but the hope that I had made me work in one of the best medical device companies as a R&D Associate.
HOPE 4
My mom gave me space to be independent. All these years, I went with the flow in which my life took me. My mom encouraged me all these times to not to lose hope.
Everything changed a little when this pandemic striked.
My parents wanted me to come back home and to stay with them.
Working from home was fine until one day.
My marriage was on my mom's list but she never forced me. Like every other mother she always says to me that I will get a guy who will love me like her. I smile at her and start dreaming like a kid who wants to see her Peterpan (Prince
Charming will never be in my list like other girls, I like him but I love Peterpan! There is a difference between Like and Love).
Parents talk about my marriage but their talks never entered my ears.
I am 23 and my family thinks I am grown up to start my own family like a typical Indian Tamilian family. I won' t blame them, it's their wish. They are not forcing me so I won't go against them.
Astrology is something that comes up during marriages. This plays a vital role and I don’t know why, but have to accept my dad’s orders. So due to the astrological predictions I had to go to a temple and worship god. After worshiping
my dad had decided to start looking for my Peterpan.
All the plans my dad and mom had crumbled because of the pandemic. My mom was the one who got so worried and whatever I did to make her happy went in vain.
She started to think more about my marriage,
At what age will I get married?
What if the pandemic makes everything
worse?
What if I don’t get married at the right age at all?
These thoughts were inside our heads in the initial stage of the lockdown days.
But when the situation heated up, my work from home days got darker than I expected. More work that my mind could not take anymore. I was no
longer having a peaceful mind. I was not able to
concentrate on work as I heard a lot that broke my heart.
I heard that one of my relative died because of Corona in Mumbai. The saddest part was that we could not even pay our last respects to him.
Few days passed, I heard COVID-19 cases are increasing in the area I am staying. Few of my neighbours were affected. They were quarantined and got back home safe. Shocking news about the COVID-19 did not stop at all !
Few of my closest relatives are sick due to Corona. The thoughts of sadness filled my mind.
I open my eyes to see myself drenched in rain and waters rolling down from my right eye.
Most of the people around the world are facing the same kind of mental problems. Some are facing physical pain too.
This COVID-19 has impacted everyone's life.
We all don’t face the same situation but the pain is the same for all.
All I could think now is what’s next ?
Whatever it is I AM NOT GOING TO LOSE HOPE.
Hoping for better peaceful days to come into our lives.
Smile, cry but don't lose HOPE.