She sat in that coffee shop again, like she did every Tuesday night just to torture herself. This was Leo’s place, who was she kidding? Everywhere was Leo’s place. Another place he should be but never would. She whispered his name into her black coffee, causing ripples with her breathe in the bitter dark liquid. Before Leo, she would down her coffee in seconds flat, if coffee drinking were an Olympic event she would win every time against anyone. Before Leo, she did a lot of things, left food out to spoil, and crumpled laundry saw more of the hamper than it ever did folded nicely in the drawers he bought. Before Leo Hailey was more than lost, she wasn’t alive. Before Leo, she had hated her green eyes, and vibrant curly red hair, and freckles that cover her whole eggshell white body. Her voice was always too much, too wild, like everything else about her. His voice was soft but respectable, his voice was just enough, like everything else about him. But she never hated his auburn brown eyes that always changed in the sunlight, or his sweet honey skin that never burned or darkened, or his silly black hair that he always kept just slightly more than short. This coffee shop was always Leo’s favorite, Hailey never saw why, the lighting was horrible both inside and in the courtyard, which was hardly bigger than a public swimming pool, quite a bit smaller actually. He always laughed at her complaining about the lighting, Leo always got a beverage much too sweet for Hailey’s taste from the menu along with a scone, he always picked lemon because she couldn’t stand it, she would get something with raisins or cranberries just to see his nose crinkle in disgust, she loved that look, his eyes squinting and his smooth baby like face would wrinkle, losing any sharpness in his jaw. When he made that face his eyes looked darker than eyes ever should, that face revealed something in him no one else knew about, maybe not even him. The poets came out to share their work under the fairy lights that surrounded the courtyard and that was her cue to leave. But as she tried to stand she found herself immobile, no one looked at her. She was panicked until she saw him, Leo was standing there in front of the mic and she lost her need to move. He held a paper in front of him, his eyes had dark circles under them, they were glossy and lost, his shirt was stained and wrinkled, he looked like a hardened abandoned soul, where was her boy with the bright eyes, goofy smile, and relaxed stance. Now his stance read defeat, what was she seeing, she shouldn’t be seeing him at all, that car crash killed him instantly. His voice was rough, like gravel being driven over, like it was too shattered to break like it was just so utterly tired of existing. His lost eyes wandered to the paper held in front of him in his stiff fists, and he began to speak “This is for you baby, it’s called Before Hailey.” He cleared his throat and began reading. “She said she was always too much, but I was never enough. She was like sunlight peeking through the clouds after a lifetime of darkness, her light was the only one to ever reach me. What I would give to stare at her clover green eyes again, to tap her endless freckles as we fall asleep, to watch her down a scalding cup of bitter coffee darker than the void we go to after we die, what I would give to see her alive. Hailey I hope it was easy to die, I hope you have found a way to leave me behind, I've accepted that you will never come back. The house is empty, like me, like everything. My life without you is full of nothing but bland existing, with you, life only held vibrate living. I hope I at least get to enjoy the ending, before you Hailey, I thought I had everything but after you I know see that I never had anything unless I had you, I now truly know the meaning of nothing.” He Grabbed the gun from inside his laptop bag and before she could move her arm in protest a shot rang through the night, his head exploded and he fell off the stool he sat on, and she remembered the car crash. She felt the pain of losing him all over again, but she saw that he had lost her first. But then he sat across from her at the table, watching everyone try and save him. They sipped their coffee and smiled. Finally, she could stand, they got up and walked towards what had to be the portal between the two worlds of the living and the dead. Hailey turns to Leo “come on honey, I’m sure they have much better lighting.” Leo laughed, squinting his eyes just the way she loved and with that, they left the world behind.
Story