I am so sad that I met him
I had the most beautiful year of my life because he made me feel so delighted.
Whenever I look at him everything was so perfect, he made all my problems disappear.
....
But now,
He doesn't care.
It's so absolutely soul crushing.
All I can think of is bad things, and all the unpleasant things I want to do to myself in order to punish me for screwing such a beautiful thing up.
I love him so much and I just wish he'd give one last chance to change myself.