We have always been caught up with the idea to becoming better for someone else - someone you love or someone who hurt you even. You want to change for the purpose of being accepted by other people. You want to prove other people wrong. Hoping someone would see you’re worthy. That you are worthy for someone you hoped to be with.
After years of loving other people, I had my mind driven to being the kind of person they wanted me to become. I changed my own ways, broke traditions and moulded my own flesh to a lady I had never pictured myself to be. I have always lived in the idea of being happy for other people’s happiness though it wasn’t happiness for me.
I had so much love to give. Too much, I forgot to love myself. And so, I was left with nothing but hatred. I was left with nothing but despair and an disempowered soul. I was left with no one but myself empty from all the love I had already given.
It has come to me after a while that the only person you should prove your worth to is yourself. Don’t fuel up other people’s happiness, and losing yours. Don’t ever throw your dignity out the window. Don’t strive to become someone better for someone else. Don’t ever love when you can’t even love yourself.
Unhappy, unworthy and undignified. I have come to the tip of the cliff just to finally realise I need to keep myself filled up with the things I have lost for others - happiness, love, and life. I'm taking all of these back.