God

                   Are we God fearing people?

This question is haunting me since many years. Well I was a kid who grew up listening to the stories of Lord Ram and Lord Krishna. My mum used to say if you don't drink milk or eat curd and butter, Lord Krishna would be angry with you. Ah! and I used to gulp down the glass of milk and eat curd without complaining.

As I grew up I heard many people say or discuss things like... go to the temple before you give your exam, or pray god before you check your result, otherwise you would fail the exam! or something like, he was not devoted to the Lord and so such bad things happened to him; and oh! your child is not well, take her to this Baba who performs miracles and your child will be back to health.

The little kid, then believed that all was true. God will not love you if you don't eat curd or drink milk. My sister will get back to health if she visits the great baba and perform rituals. I used to fear God, a lot!

When I was in 9th standard, my grand mom was very ill. So I prayed to the Lord to cure her. I used to write this book that explains the miracles of God. And then one night , suddenly I received a call from my mom that my grandmom has passed away. I was so furious at Him why had he done such horrible thing to my grand mom. She was my best friend, a super woman, the one in a million person, support system for all, back-bone of our family and above all a great devotee to Him. What had she or my aunts or my mum or the other family members not done! Why was she taken away frome me? All these were the questions that went on and on in my mind. Some home I coped up with her death.

Later My mum suggested that you pray to god every day and make a promise to him that you will offer a coconut when your wish comes true. The puny me has done so... and what I wished for hasn't come true. I was frustated this time... I convinced my mind that He doesn't love me.

It has taken me a lot of time and brains to realise that I was being misled by the people around me. Whatever happened to me was not because someone didn't love me or God was not happy with me.

Our world is driven by a force. There is a supreme energy that is responsible for the creation of our universe. This supreme energy is regarded as God and I bow to that primal source of energy that nourishes us.

Humans have given this energy different forms and some people use the chicanery tactics and en cash the faith of the people. Well should I say faith or fear? What ever it may be it only causes turmoil in some one's life.

I don't know if there is a form of God. If people consider Ram, Krishna or any other entity as God and suggest that God is our father, creator of universe, why wouldn't they show as much respect to God as they fear him? I don't fear God, I respect the extra-ordinary things He has done (what I read in books), the sufferings he has face in human life, the things or people He gave up in order to establish a just society; I respect Him. For me, the deeds a man made, makes him the God.

I wouldn't want to pray just to get my whims and fancies to be fulfilled. And it hurts me when I see people do transactions with Him. It hurts more when some one says god will hate you if you don't do this.

I respect God for His deeds, (I am not sure about the miracles that are presented to us, and I am a puny person to comment on that) and I bow in veneration to the supreme, primal energy, what I call Adi Shakthi (to which a female form is given in our scriptures) for nourishing me and all the other creatures and the entire universe. 

I am not a God-fearing person anymore.