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"Let's get used to this one."
"Getting ready to go to bed. I've been thinking of you all day."
"Maybe one day you'll run away with me."
"I think we could one day paint the town multi colours together."
"You must not listen to me, I can be dangerously spontaneous."
"I want you in my arms now."
"I miss you so much."

PAUSE-

Memories of you play in my mind in slow motion like the one on the new iPhones, where they start at a normal pace and then just at the right moment, just at the flip of your hair, everything slows down.

-UNPAUSE

"Send me a picture of you, it's been ages."
"Being here makes me think back on all the plans we made."
"You've disappeared."
"How are you today?"
"When are you coming home?"

PAUSE-

It's been months since I heard that ding on my phone. Why won't you answer me? Why haven't I heard from you? Why have you chosen my body, mind and soul as host to your infectious being?

-UNPAUSE

"I'll come see you outside for a minute, okay?"
"?"
"Call you when I'm outside.
I just wanna say hi.
That's it.
Come down.
For a sec.
..............
...................
......................
Really?!?!!
Fuck!"

PAUSE-

You were in sweats. I absolutely love you in sweats. Grey suits you well. What a dull color and yet you manage to look so insanely radiant. In sweats. Hah! You had a glass in your hand. It was filled up about two fingers with your favourite scotch. I could tell it wasn't your first drink of the night. I'm one to talk. I had just stolen my best friend's car, driven it under the influence and told him I had an 'emergency'. You were my Emergency.

-UNPAUSE

"I'm petrified."
"Lol"

PAUSE-

I hate LOL's.

-UNPAUSE

"He won't talk?"
"I'll meet you halfway."
"I trust him, you know."
"Here."
"On my way!!"

PAUSE-

It was always this game of hide and seek with you. But I played along. Willingly too. It was exciting, thrilling. It was this adventure that I'd played in my mind as a child and now get to reenact, with you! It was taboo is what it was. You loved it. You fed off of it. And I, off you.

-UNPAUSE

"I love your hands."
"I'm waiting."
"Do they know?"

PAUSE-

It had just begun and already we're constantly in fear of getting caught. Does he know? Does she? Would they hate us? All these thoughts ate at me, but never in your presence. With you around, I always felt safe. Not just form them, but from the whole world. And especially from myself.

-UNPAUSE

"Who is she?"
"Thanks for walking away."
"Goodbye."
"I'm not giving it to anyone."
"Don't bother with me."
'Please."
"Is this how you want it to be?"
"I'm outside your gate."
"DO NOT!"
"But you said Yes.
I'll be there in 15 minutes."
"You know how my dad can be."
"THROW IT OUT THEN!!!
Chuck it in the bin! I hate you!"
"Thanks."
"Thank you."
"I hope you change and see someday, for your own good."
"I hope I change too. Because this fucking hurts too much."
"You had a chance to change all of this."
"Thank you for everything."
"Take care okay?"