I see him. I see her. I see you. I see myself. And we all are the same. That person who is making a sham call to me to hack my bank account, that person who stealthily picks up a 100 rupee note lying crumbled on the footpath when no one is watching, that person who gets unreasonably and condescendingly authoritative on getting power, that person who is planning to invade a new resident’s house to plunder tonight and that person who burnt himself in his house to get over the unbearable trauma life offered him when his wife, the victim of domestic violence, went away with their children- I feel, is her, is him, is you, is me.
And when I feel this, I feel the separateness created by my mind amongst us - human beings - fading away. I feel the oneness in all of us. I feel compassionate both towards the victims and the wrongdoers because they both have been unable to experience the potential abundant goodness in themselves and the world.
“I will never do what she did.”
“I wouldn’t have done that had I been in her/his place.”
“I can’t imagine how can she/he even think of doing that?”
“If I were you, I would have done better.”
All these sentences lack validation because in actual, you can never be in another person’s place, that exact place in which he/she is now or has ever been. The environment in which they grew up, the values which they saw around, the type of education which they got (or they never got any), the experiences they were a part of, the decisions they were a result of, the failures they have survived, the joys they have cherished, the air they have taken in their lungs, and the sky they have lived under- can we ever experience all this in that moment in which we make a judgment about others for their action/behavior/thought?
Before reaching to the end, let’s try to take a ride through what brought that insensitive/disrespectful/cynic/violent/intolerant/impatient/stone-hearted fellow human there.
Let’s try to draw an analogy. Take an example of seeds. There are two same types of seeds. They are sowed in two different places having different topography, temperature, soil, receiving different amount of sunlight, water and care. One of the seeds grows into a big tree with green leaves and beautiful flowers. However, the other seed which received relatively less amount of sunlight, water and care grows into a weak tree with its branches infected and hence, no flowers. The infected tree starts to fight with the healthy one for nutrients and water by spreading its roots out to gain strength. Eventually, the healthy tree starts to shed away its leaves and produce fewer flowers. The villagers come and cut that tree down for it was endangering the existence of the healthy tree which has had an ideal upbringing.
The healthy tree needed help. But so did the infected one. They both were the victims in a truer sense. One- of another’s misdeeds and the other- of its own demons.
Compassion for the wrongdoer doesn’t mean compassion for the wrong. It just suggests an approach which looks for transformation in the wrongdoer rather than his/her elimination.
We all are evil. We all are angels.
How about we invest our energies into transforming the evil into angels?
I see him. I see her. I see you. I see myself. And we all are the same.