On these restless summer nights I lay in my empty bed,
I’m awake waiting for that midnight call to get me out of this mental state,
I waste my breath trying to remember all of the wrong things I've ever said,
You're the reason I can’t even sleep anymore,
Lately my bedroom walls have been keeping me company at 4 in the morning,
They're there for me when I start to mourn over what I've lost,
I find myself staring at the ceiling thinking about how you’re now gone,
Out of sight but still weighing heavy on my mind
I still feel you in my chest I convinced myself that you've never left.
These days I miss the girl I used to talk too,
You killed yourself inside to feel fine,
No longer burdened to exist with a fucked up mind,
You left me on my own without a map to get to where you went,
No note left behind to be read or even a goodbye to be heard,
I guess that’s how you wanted it to be,
I never knew if I could've rescued you,
I don't even care if I fall apart at this rate,
I'm already lower than the dirt I had to bury you in.
Getting used to breaking down isn't the same as getting better,
For the past year I've been trying to move on,
I'm trying my best to live without you,
But all the songs I listen to remind me of your fucking smile,
It seems like I'm running out of time when I've been trying to run away from my thoughts of you,
I'm beating myself black & blue by simply refusing to let go,
My fingers are growing numb down to the bone,
They're exhausted from gripping so tightly to the idea of you coming back one day,
My seams are falling apart without you around to hold them together,
Please don't let me come undone.