My friends keep telling me to stop
To put down my pen
and keep my notebook away
To stop writing and caring
They say,
Don't think about him
I say,
I'm trying
They say,
Forget everything
I say,
I'm trying
They say,
Live your life without him
I say,
I'm trying
They tell me to write about something else
And I'm really, really trying
I try to write about the moon and the stars
But I remember how we bared our souls under the night sky
I try to write about my favorite stories
But I remember how we first met and that will always be my favorite one
I try to write about letting go
But I remember how his hand fitted in mine so perfectly
I try to write about the trees, the sky, the ocean
But I keep remembering him
How he called my name
How he used to tell me that I matter
How he made me believe that he cared
How he made me feel so much better
How much he hurt me
How he left me
How much I hate him
How much I miss him
How much I hate myself for loving him
How much I want to forget
How much I'm trying to stop the tears
And I'm trying
I really am