I remember, it was one of my rare lazy evenings. It was one of the times where I feel so relaxed and not worrying. It is a rare moments where my anxiety stops. I mean, I can't forget how I feel so contented and calm that night. I was watching some clips of Oprah's interview with Michael Jackson.
The walls, gates and furnitures were all marked by luxury. It was like a kingdom or maybe a palace. How can one be so damn rich to buy himself an amusement park -- duh! its Michael Jackson.
That time, I thought to myself, life would've been easy if I'm born in a high profile family. I can get all I want, what I want.
There are times, in my teenage years, where I put all the blame to my parents. I always told them how I hated them for creating me when they had a financial crisis. They should've worked hard. They should've planned everything.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not like that always. It's just a burst of emotion and frustrations? maybe.
I don't really know if it's just me or we all did went through a phase where we used to be materialistic.
As I get more into the video, it strucked me when The King of Pop's face softens when he talked about his lost childhood. He talked about how his 10 years old self had a 3 hours of studying with a tutor then the rest of his day would be him on the recording studio or interviews or photo sessions.
I felt his sadness. It affects me because . . . my parents would be like him -- sad as him -- if they tried too hard to earn money.
Everything happens for a reason. Michael Jackson had suffer but now, financial issues isn't his problem anymore. My parents enjoyed their childhood and it's not their fault, and it will never be.
I might look at our situation back then like we were suffering but we were'nt. Suffering is an exaggeration. It may look like it but I would prefer to call it challenges.
I used to ask money from my parents to get a tattoo, a piercing, buy some food, accessories and other stuffs. I used to be so annoying.
I turned off my laptop and smirked at my selfish, materialistic self in the past, as I lay over my unfinished paperworks. I'm contented with my life now and I have a good relationship with my parents. All I wanted now is a cup of coffee and my one rare lazy evening to come again.