Another boring summer here in NEW YORK is done .I know this might sound crazy , but i was really feeling like a dead fish all the time. People see our New york like a land of speed and good times. They are very wrong about the second part , throw and put "crime , fear and bossy people " , You will get then the right and bright defenition . It's not that i hate the city , hello !! I spent my childhood here . I am Serena Miles in love with every little part of my city , even with all the shitty times and great faillures that i lived here . At least i am going to college "NY UNIVERSITY " . I will take it as a new start . I promised my best friends Drake and Mia to do so . I won't let them down .
Meet my rocks
"Darling" mum called
"Yes mother " i replay
"Come downstairs serena , your father and i want to talk to you "
"Okay ,coming "
"Hurry up babe" dad's strong voice says . Mom and Dad are sometimes extremly bossy . I love them , they have always been here like they will always be . I appreciate that i have a bit of privacy and lately they remain playing the guide in my life. I am so glad school won't pull me away from them .
"Serenaaaaaa" oscar said
"Coming no need to shout little boy "
"Caught up in your thoughts again ? " Mum said in a funny voice .
"Here you are reading me like an open book hhhhhh" . I am now downstairs ready to hear the same lecture from yesterday about SCHOOL and all the DO's and DON'Ts .I am enjoying no matter what . My rebel days are about to start.
" I smell heaven , Dad are you cooking"
" Omelette aux herbes fines for the prettiest Serena "
"I love you Papa " i said in a craZy way , and i laid a kiss on his cheek . Mom was watching jealously .
" Rosie miles do you want a kiss to "
"I will be glad babe "
"Mouah mom i love you too " i shout the last words.
"Baby girl neighbours will run away hhhhh" mom freaked out . I love her trying to give me the lady maners and fails miserably .
I was playing with oscar's hair , (he is my dearest little brother and i appreciate him coming to life 10 years ago when i was 8, it was a joyfull day ).When dad starts clearing his throat ,"So serena are you ready for tomorrow "
" Oh dad i will barely sleep , i am so exited "
" Your mother and i are very proud of you "
"I wouldn't be here without you two "
" We want you to focus on your management studies ,you are already halfway , i know that you are a young women and that you will succed to enjoy your life and keep it organised too".
" I am glad you trust me , and now what about eating ?? "
" Enough curves hhhhh "
"Moooom "
"Only kidding babe " .
" I want choco mum " oscar said
" Can you eat normal for one day oscar"mom said sadly
" He's not normal " i said .
Oscar is making funny faces to all of us , he is the best in that .
"Serena eat then put some clothes on Mia and I are taking you shopping for tomorrow "
"Okay , love you ladies " i can't believe Mia . It will be so tiring .
Besties
Mom decided that Mia and i need sometime together before school's start , that's why we are spending that time in the mall "shooping is not my thing by the way " . Of course we visited all the stores until i couldn't walk anymore , Mia got me buying two dresses , one high heels and a girlish bag . I am girlish but when it comes to pink Mia is the specialist . After begging for ages she decided finally that we should have a drink somewhere to get ready for round 2 , this time i doubt that i will make it. Time flies like a flash of light , spending time with Mia is really an important thing for me , in my life Mia is a big part , she is here and somehow i know she will always be. For the last 4 years she was my unbiologycal sister , thanks GOD we get to chose our friends ,and i am so happy for chosing Mia and drake , Drake is a different story , Mia once arranged a date for me and from that day Drake and i are inseperable thanks to Mia's genuis ideas . I am so glad the three of us are on the same path and that we are all trying to keep our friendship until death torn us apart or shall she not since souls lives longer than bodies do . A good big hug and we said goodbye it will be one long week until we meet again, and we are left between destiny's hands till then. May luck and God's help be on my side for the big day tomorrow . I want to discover the new serena
It begins
It was dark when i woke up, my clock marked 4:45 , i knew my exitement won't let me get some sleep. I drowned in my own big ocean , a wave after another took me from a though to a new one , i have never resisted this situation , i can stay still for hours just thinking , sometimes i feel that my head will end up burning with a huge fire of rage . Old , young and dead i experienced it all . Some time i am removed from it by a headache or a wake up call.
Morning was pretty good , i love daddy's breakfast and mama's coffee . I put one my blue short dress and of course my pair of converse, lipgloss and a bit of mascara my dark long black hair was straight on my back , i felt pretty thanks to Mia's taste.
My father drops me by university's big door, and heads fast to work , He is an emergency doctor so speed was just what he needs. I standed face to face with the monster and butterflies in my stomach were dancing in a terrible way.
I made my first step barley breathing , and all of a sudden i found myself on the hard ground . An Audi Suv hits me on the hand causing me to fall nearly on the face . I got a big bruise on my left knee and blood droops to cover my converse. Taking by the big pain , i was now in tears ( damn the bad start) , untill a greec God was standing in front of me .
"I am so sorry " , He said than he laughed a boyish all american boy laugh , his smile set all my body on fire. His blue eyes were gazing through me , and i couldn't do anything but laughing even though i was just acting like a baby.
"I will take you to NY MEDHELP , because there's no way you continue walking like this"
I tried to refuse but his voice holds an autority that makes me ready to say yes on giving my life away .
I though we will walk till the mini hospital , but i was in his big arms , and his long brown locks of hair were on my arm which is around his neck , that intimacy caused me to shiver head over elbows . I was concentrating on his arm's muscles untill he catched me staring . " you like what you see?" he said . I flushed scarlet and he laughed comfortably.
He droped me gently on the chair so that the nurse can treat my big bruise, he also held my hand when she was cleaning my injury .
After all was done, he carried me untill the assistant office to take all the informations , somehow he knew it is my first day in the university. He put me on my feet .
" I am Joseph by the way "
" I am serena , thanks for everything Joseph"
"You can call me Joe , are you new here ?"
"Yes , i am first year management"
"I've been here for two years before you so i am here to help serena, I am sorry again."
He was on his way before , i could replay , God he is even hotter in that blue shirt that make his blue eyes perfectly shinny , and my name on his lips had an incredible sweetness. I spent my day making fantasies about Joe and texting Mia and Drake about him . Mmmm , this is quite a start .
I was back home and my dearest parents were ready like an army to bombard me with their questions , i gave them the minimum of the events keeping the rest a mistery.
It begins 2
Sleeping was really comfortable. I had plenty of sexy dreams . Joseph was there of course or the dream would'nt be sexy at all . I was under the charm of his blue eyes and the way his smile is perfectly white . wooow this boy is a catch .
I love to wake up to college now , it feels good having a motivation to keep you in love with your studies, i have always had motivations for this purpuse , that was the secret behind me being a nerd ( the first one) all the past years , i may not look like one but i am .
Getting ready is an obligation after yesterday . I HAVE to look my best , and to be presentable at all ways. Mia offers to drive me to school today , since she did not get some sleep and she won't before knowing the entire details about joe ( so agent Mia ). Mia knows me as earth knows flowers, as sky is familiar with stars , i loved her for this reason , she was there for me and it felt like heaven having someone so close ,someone knowing you by heart .
The road for college was not a short cut , so Mia and i had plenty of time to speak about my first little adventure .
When Mia droped me by school it was really early for my courses to start , so i took a seat in the big backyard garden where it is extremly quit and pulled my "Pierre daco's " favourite book "Comprendre les femmes " . A hell of a bibliophile yes i am . I was completly ignoring the real world while i was inside my book as i do inside my thoughts ,it is a part of me that i think it will never change i am a day dreamer and a night thinker .
In a suden there was someone besides me JOE woooooow , i didn't think that i will be meeting him so quickly, and his smell was enough to pull me from my soul's best corners, like nothing did before.
"Hi" i said
"Goodmorning sunshine" he replayed
I felt the heat climbing up fast to reach my cheeks woow he called me what , now i was stuck in my thoughts again unable to break free.
"You was really into the book is it that good?"
"I am pretty much into them all"i giggled
" So serena the booky which class do you have this morning ?"he asked
"Are you being sarcastic?" I said then i got up
"How could i make fun out of you in that dress "
Now i am beyond happiness , how could he be serious , sexy and flirty . agh does he even exist ?
We headed to my buisness class , he told that it was next to his , so we could walk together . He study political science and it felt strong but it gave him a dangerous abilities , he had the sweetest talk that i have ever heard and It turned me on so bad , it worked on me like magic .
When i made my first step into the class room he pulled me roughly into his arms and he wishpered "later serena, see you at lunch in the backyard booky girl" , then he pulled me back . I felt a thousand emotions at once . This scene was so erotic , it felt like a slap , a kiss , like something new and strange . Of course i am meeting him at lunch , i am ready to meet him now , and suddenly i regret losing my virginity to edward my gross classmate last summer , and i don't even know why i am thinking like this . This boy is getting in my bones very fast and it is super exiting .
Under the charm
Did i ever mentioned that i love flowers ?I am a very romantic person , i owe that to the books i have read. And inside a land full of roses i spent the last four hours thinking about Joe .
He is intimidating and i like that about him . His eyes were able to look through me but not only that ,they were able to let the secrets get out of my heart and meet them at my eyes , so like that he knows me , my eyes already let him see what even for me is unknown .
He lights up the mood with his i-am-sexy smile ,and his messy hair and beard throw you inside fantasies about the alpha male that every woman is looking for . Speaking of alpha he has that deep , strong voice that sends all my fire alarms on .
Now, all what i have on my mind is our meeting after lunch in the backyard , i guess he doesn't see me as a friend, for God's sake he gave me compliments about my dress ( more like about how i look in it ) , friends don't talk like that , do they ?
"Ding ding ding " the bell rings , and soon i was out from the class , when i felt an arm on my shoulder , i turned and it was a girl from my class holding my pencil case .
"I guess it is yours ? " She said
"Oh ,yes thank you "
" I am lilly by the way "
" I am serena , my friends call me SE " . she is extremly pretty with her long blond hair locks and her wide big hazel eyes.
"See you soon then SE "
" Yes , catch you later " , And i was on my way .
Another two steps and i was once more a prisonner of Joe's strong arms , God it felt like paradise, i was under the charm before i knew it .
"There is a meeting in the university this afternoon , so we are both free . " He wishpered in my ear , and his warm breath sent a weird sensations all over me , it was like a good song and like a sweet escape from the often scary reality . " you didn't answer , are you free ? " He said realising exactly the effect that he got on me . I flushed scarlet then managed to spell three letters "yes".
We arrived to the parking lot , he pulled the door for me and i was thrilled, we was on the road for a mistery and a kind of start for something i hoped for and i wish it is coming true finally .
Falling
I had never been with a boy that i like in an intimate space when there is nothing between us that we could count as distance .I felt pretty much scared,exited and butterflies were really taking a group zoumba session in my belly. Even though i was faking confidence and trying to look sure and normal , but his eyes can look into me like i was a glass window , and it made me uncomfortable and he knew exactly what he was putting me through . All of a sudden , my phone let "shakira , Empire" breath and fill the air and the silence between us .
"Hello mother. " I answered
"Hi baby , are you with Mia ?"
"Actually , i am not , i am with a friend."
"Oh , i see . Okey be careful and don't be late . "
"Okey , then see you soon ."
He came closer to my ear and whispered " Not very soon " , He kissed my cheek and then his eyes were back on the road , he left me breathless .
My mind stilled blank for seconds , then the weird sensation got me happy like a little baby , and he was checking me with the corner of his eye , so proud with how he can already plays me like a little doll .
His lips on my cheek felt better then all the times i had sex in my entire being , so lost i was all the way , until we stopped by the seashore .
" A date by the sea ,what do you think ? " He said
" So it is a date now ."
"Oh yes , it is come let's go " .
He grabbed a picnic's full package and a bottle of wine , we set everything up , then we faced each other . I flushed and felt soon intimidated by his presence , like i know practically nothing about this guy , and here i am with him far away from Manhattan , and by the seashore starting my dream date , how could he be so perfect , so fast in getting me into this sort of game that leaves you fascinated and overwhelmed ?
"I like it when you do that ." he said quietly
" When i do what ?"
"When you get shy , you blush , And then you look down to your crossed fingers ,you start thinking and BAAM , you are lost ."
" Wow , impressive , i like something you do too ."
" You do now ?".
"Stop intimidating me ."
"Do i ?".
" I will totally ignore you ." i said in a funny way .
He took my face nicely and came really close until i was looking exactly into his eyes and then he said " what does you like then ? "
I couldn't put my face down , because he had his hand on my chin , i was really shy in my position .My temperature was raising , and i turned to be red . He was gazing deep in my eyes , then he came closer . The tension between us became higher and an electricity shock made my very small parts scream . He was reducing distance between us on and on , and i couldn't move from my place. A second later i was happy i didn't , he gave me a blissful kiss that made my lips and all of me tingle and shake , it was rough, sweet and so soul satisfying.
When our lips came apart i felt locked out of heaven , he smiled his i-know-i-am-killing-you half smile , and i said bravely : "I like the way that you know exactly your strenght and you don't mind using it at all" . He felt a flush of pride and he giggled in a sexy way , oh i love it when he let himself go and he became young and free to do what youth is making us do, " You are turning me upside down and just in a few days , it 's you who got the strength Serena".
We spent the rest of the date laughing and enjoying ourselves without over thinking , without caring and without feeling a part of the creepy , scary world besides us , we was on the edge of everything , it was nice and new. When he drives me it was late 10 or maybe 11 , i don't want to know , all i know is that i was shaking with happiness when i arrived home.
"SE is it you " ,mom said .
" Yes it is me , i am sorry for being late "
" So glad you are safe and shining with happiness , babe you know i trust you , now go get some sleep."
"Goodnight then , and by the way his name is Joseph, I laid a kiss on her cheek and i hugged her tightly , she had quiet a hard time with me , since i was a sick baby , and i am not going to do something silly to make her and my father live that again .
I went to bed thinking about Joe and hoping he is what it seems , and hoping i am playing safe if he is not.
I was in my short and T-shirt , and it was midnight when i heard my phone ringing . Why would Drake call me now.
"Se we need you " , He said in a shaky way.
"What is the big deal Drake , it's midnight you are scaring the shit out me, if it is one of your silly pranks i swear you will be dead , Mia will definitely help , i have courses tomorrow morning , i will be ready for pranks on the weekend, Goodnight baby girl ." , I was laughing while i cut of the line , pranks are just drake's favourite hobby , maybe it's his only hobby . My phone filled the air with my ring tone again .
" Yes drake, you are not losing hope , don't you ."
" It's not a prank , Mia is at the ER"
"WHAT ,WHY ??!!? "
" You need to be at central hospital , i cannot leave her to come and get you ."
"Dad is on a work trip , and mom got to work on the early morning , what will i do Drake ".
"Find a way Serena , you always do, she is so sick , they said she ate something maybe ".
"Okay , i will be there , see you , bye".
God, Mia , how?? And when?? I was so confused , Drake just said that she is in a bad situation right now what will i do , who will take me there . I have to be there , she needs me beside her , Miss Melissa must be really scared now , Mia is her only daughter and she is a single mom . While i was struggling with my thoughts , and tears were streaming down , drawing a line on my cheeks, my phone ringed again , I thought it was drake , so i answered immediately and quickly .
"Drake, i am sorry , there is no way i can come to central alone now , my last chance is finding a cab , but going to the next bloc is so dangerous . I am going to do it anyway , just tell me now how Mia is doing ? Is Melissa there ? "
"Who is Drake . I am coming to drive you to central , just wait . " Joe's voice pops into my ear like a heaven's call .
"Joseph ? "
He hang on before i could answer .
I must get myself ready , he said he was coming in a short time . Fifteen minutes later , the Audi Suv was on my house front door , i left mom a note and i left in a hurry , i know mom will come to the hospital tomorrow morning and we will really argue about why didn't I wake her up , but as much as i need to be there by Mia's side my mother also can use some sleep for tomorrow , she often sleeps early , but her concern about me today took away a couple of hours from her night's rest .
Joe wad already out of the car in a SHORT , black shorts and a white simple shirt , spreading heat around him , a heat that certainly reaches me alone since the street was empty. He smiled at me once our eyes met , and i felt a flash of relief holds my soul and makes my problems hide for a brief time.
"Serena , good-evening "
"Hello again Joe, i am so sorry for bringing you out of bed ."
"Get in the car , We are technically dating , so it's what i have to do don't i ?"
I buckled up while i was thinking again about his statement , damn it , Yes we are dating . I hold his hand before he begin his ride .
"You are saving me right now . Thanks Joe ."
"You are my lois lane " , And he clines with his perfect glowing eye , God i can eat this boy , all of this boy .
We headed straight to the hospital and it was already 2:00 , no sleep for today i guess . My concern and fear about Mia was growing now that we were close to the hospital , once we arrived, we were told that she was in the surgery and that we can wait for her with her other family members .
"What ?? Surgery . Why ?? " I asked the nurse that she explained to me that she has got no informations about Mia's case.
"Joe , you can go now , i will be alright . Drake is here so don't worry , i will keep you updated." i said with tears streaming down my face.
He came closer , and he kisses me like he was trying to tell me that he is here, that because of him i will be comfortable , that i belong to him , and that it will be alright ,that the storm will end up fading .
"I am going no where , with Drake or without him , i drove you here , and i took you on a date today plus i kissed you twice , Girl you are my responsibility . I care about you Se "He was honest , and i felt much more hope.
Gone
We found Mia's room after a while . When Joe and I arrived, she was already in the surgery . Melissa and Drake where in the waiting room right in front of where Mia was .The situation was a mess, and hell we didn't know it was about to get even worse . The doctors and nurses didn't speak to me , neither did Melissa , she was crying over the last piece of happiness that was left in her daily reality , her daughter and my dearest friend. She was losing her temper and she had to . How could a person be patient ? How could we find patience in circumstances like these ? I tried my best to find a piece of serenity in that doomed room, and when i did i used it all to keep Melissa strong , i was inventing stories about how Mia was optimist , the truth is that she wasn't , but i wanted to believe she will be fine , eventhough somehow i knew she won't . I hid my hideous and unpleasent thoughts away ; in another galaxy and i wished they can go far than that . I wanted so bad to be a hope spreader but i needed a hope shot more than anyone around, Melissa got her hope from God and her mother's heart, Drake got it from how little he knew about Mia , even if they are good friends . I glanced at Joe 's hand in mine , then to his perfect face , trying to drink a little of his beauty. He came close to me , and he slided his nose on mine after kissing the top of my head . I smiled a very sad smile .
" Are you being strong , even if it hurts so much love ?" He said quitley .
" It hurts." I said with my trembling lips , and my eyes full of tears .
" Talk to me Serena ."
At this words , i felt like he knew Mia , like he was there for my whole life . I looked at him , his eyes were full of concern . I skiped all my boundaries and I let all my heart out saying :"Mia is my unbiological sister , she is here when i need her , she is a part of my life since always . I need my best girl here , my heart is filled with things , she doesn't know yet . I want her to meet you , I want her to let advises rain on me like i am in some tip book . I want her to call me nerd and to drag me from my hair to every single party . I am sorry but do you understand Joe ".
" How can I not ? You make every word held a charge of sens and meanings , you don't know how lovely you are right now . I hope Mia will be back Se ."
" Nobody said it was easy , she always warned she will be missed , we just ignored her words because she was always there."
" Can I tell you something ? "
"Yes Joe anything ." I said laughing .
" Look at me , this is our start , the beginning of us . You are now honest and strong , it's not the right timing , but can i ask you to stay like this forever ?"
"Yes , it's not the time nor it's the good place , but if i do promise you that i will remain the same forever , can i ask not to break my heart , because it will be broken in case ....". I start crying after cuting my sentense . Joe held me in both arms immediately . "Mia will be fine" He said .
I stayed in his arms what it seems like eternity. Hoping that the only sister i have will walk through the door somehow , telling us (why are you afraid people ?Ha !! You love me right , Ooooh Serena who is the hot stuff next to you ) .
I checked Joe's arm-watch and it was 6:00 , time really went fast , and i guess i fell asleep on Joe's hard chest . " Bright and shine sleepy head ". He said softly in my ear . I smiled then turned to find mom and dad around . My mother stood up , and i was quickly out of his arms , she said "we met Joe , he is great , i am glad you arrive here safe ." Then she gave me a rough time for not waking her up when i received the news about Mia .
" Where is Mia ?" I said loudly
"They don't let us see her yet " dad replied .
"Isn't she out yet ? " i asked my parents , with wide open eyes .
"No, not yet darling , she is under observation , that's what her doctor said ." My mother answered .
I looked across the room , and saw Melissa sitting in the corner sad , she was like an empty , dry body . She must be tired from crying so much . No one of us can feel the state of mind she was in . Mothers are amazing , and i can't find words to use for paying them all the noble care they hold for us . I was stuck in my thoughts like always , when Joe came along with the doctor , Why was the doctor speaking with him out of us all ?
" Mr.Roberts , I'll go check on her case now , i didn't know i am sorry ." The doctor said .
"Okay , we are waiting then ." Joe replied in a cold way .
So , aside from rich , i guess Joe was well known by his last name ( Roberts ) . In a few minutes , the doctor came back with a blank face and a slow walk , his expression turned blue each step he made towards us . I felt that he was the satan , or worse . My mind starts giving him a red skin and a black tail . My heart twists in a sudden . I was sinking in an ocean of darkness , I felt nothing but my father 's hand helding mine , he must've understand before the doomed words were spoken to Melissa .
" To skies we all belong , be strong , she won't be with you , not anymore ."
Melissa let go a soul shaking scream full of pure pain , then she passed out . I took a seat since my feet could not keep me still anymore . The biggest part of me still waiting for Mia to get out of the room , i was stuck in the past a bit , i was shocked . I wanted to cry like others , even Joe let go a tear from his perfect eye , that tear that i envy so much for slinding down his cheek , untill his three days beard, i simply couldn't , accepting Mia's death was forbidden for my mind . I closed my eyes and went down a deep sleeping hoping that Mia would take me to her , or join me here . Just before sleeping , i heard ( cause of death : suicide ) .