"I wish I never existed, " this is the message he sent me. It was 11:11pm back then and this is his only wish.
He's miles away but it seems like I heared him whispered those words while staring at the time shown in his phone as if he's counting his last seconds.
I felt so useless that time. I can't even transform into a super saiyan who can fly there immediately to show him his purpose. I know I can't but I wish I could.
I wish I could go inside his head to light up a single bulb of positivity and make things in his perspective alright.
I wish I could knock at his heart—entering silently to calm him down and make sure he's alright.
I wish he'll let me.
"I wish I never existed"— but those words he let go is like a black hole and not even a single light of hope can escape. Those words made a hell inside of me and continues to eat me up until now.
"I wish you're fine"
"I wish you're alright"
"I wish you a happy life"
I want to reply these wishes for him but instead... I just listened.
Those wishes of mine are not enough to pick him up or to make him stand when he was sitting in the corner of his room, sulking in the darkness.
Those wishes of mine are not enough to make him sleep at night when he is drowing in his pain and tears.
I admit I loved him for many years though I rarely see this dark part of him.
"I wished I never existed"
When he let go of these words, I could've confessed "I love you".
But then I sadly realized that my love is not enough to save him.
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"I'm listening, " I replied to him. It was 11:12pm back then.
"So... Until 3 am? " he asked.
"Of course. "