A Mere Tail

"Antara I swear this cream works, it works wonders” said Garima aunty after gulping down the entire glass of Aloe vera juice at one go. I was at my aunt’s (or pipi as I fondly called her) house for a week after my part 1 exams got delayed by almost two and a half months. We lived in the same city, yet since my nursery days it almost became a ritual to stay over at her place for quite some time, after the annual exams got over. The ritual was a little disturbed for the last couple of years owing to the board examinations that followed one after the other. And now after this depressing postponement, I dialled up pipi’s number telling I would be landing at their place any time soon. She gave her ever welcoming laughter saying I should better arrive before the lunch gets cold. And there I was staring at that huge glass with the slurry greenish liquid ending in a rim of white foam. “Minie, this tastes heaven, I swear, come on drink up” I gave a wry smile to Garima aunty’s habitual swear. “So Antara, where was I"she turned to pipi “yeah this cream, I bought it on Mantra.”

“Myntra” I almost spoke out of inertia after a quick sip of the juice.

She gave out a squeak of laughter. “Yes yes myntra mantra, it’s all the same you know!”

“And Minie this juice too I bought from myntra only, on Garima’s suggestion” said Pipi.

Now that explained why we had moong sprouts salad for lunch and now this hideous juice. Pipi was turning into a health nut on Garima aunty’s mantras!!!! Urrghhhh!

How I had thought of having keema fried rice, and this new neighbour of hers spilled moong on my dreams!

Pipi listened with eager eyes as Garima aunty went on “Antara it’s miracle in a box. You only tell me haven’t the wrinkles reduced? Don’t I look younger? Don’t I Minie?” turning towards me.

I mean how could I possibly happen to say how many of her fine lines had vanished or how far she had progressed in her battle with the wrinkles? I just met her that day.

“And this cream also helps in increasing the length of your tail”

Was something wrong with my ears, or she actually said “tail”!

Both Pipi and I sat dumbstruck.

“Uff you people, don’t you read newspaper?”

When we were kids, some of the teachers in school frustrated with our nuisances shouted out “Have you all left your tails at home you little monkeys, or are they being tailored at some local shop?” But they obviously were at their ironical best. Let alone irony I couldn’t make out anything as to how an anti-ageing cream could increase the length of your tail???

“Now come here, look at this article that has come up” She held out her Xperia, and yeah this too was a mantra deal only. I took it from her hand hurriedly to unravel the mystery about tails. “Telomere extension by telomerase has been found to prevent ageing.” I jerked back to the sofa.

“See didn’t I tell you Tail-low-mee-arr. Such a complicated name, so I shortened it to tail” she gushed.

Yes I’m a student of life sciences and we do study about telomere and telomerase the biological clock, but certainly not about creams triggering telomerase action. As kids we can’t wait to grow up, and once we grow up, we are desperate to halt the process. We are desperate to look young, look good, but can’t we look our age and look good.

“Ok Antara got to go now,but please do buy this one ,you surely don’t want to lose out on your tails don’t you?” She left giving a snobbishly nasty laugh.

“Ok pipi this Aloe vera juice isn’t going to sretch my TAIL by 500 base pairs, so I beg of you to give me some genuinely edible food.”

"Yeah yeah, I made fruit custard for you, its chilling in the fridge."winked Pipi

I made a punch of victory in the air and ran towards the fridge.

After about an hour been relived of the stomach growls,I turned on the TV,when suddenly the doorbell rang. I opened the door to find a guy in those typical sales guy uniforms with a box in his hand.

I shouted out “pipi your TAIL has arrived!”