Midnight Thoughts

I feel so down right now knowing how happy you were while here I am, still  broken and miserable, thanks to you.

It's funny how fast you've moved.. While im here, still stuck in you. Haha 😂 Am I that desperate to say how much I wanted to get you back? i wanna punch myself for hurting myself. Do you understand what I mean?
I may seem happy and smiles are all over me but inside I'm like a wound and muriatic acid is poured all over me. I'm like a vase that fell from a 100 storey building and being shattered after touching the ground. I'm like a huge pimple being squeezed so hard and I'm so tired of pretending that everything is fine and nothing is wrong. I wanna scream with all of my might but all I can do is to cry silently.
Yes, friends do ease the pain but they don't really take away the pain totally because the only one who can help yourself is only you.

It hurts to hear from others how happy you are but it feels worse confirming it. It hurts to know that you're ready for a new relationship, that you liked another girl, that you're now happy, that you've moved on while me? 😂 I'm the only one who's still suffering, who's still broken and I'm still affected.

I'm so done. Everytime I sleep you're still  in my dreams. And in my dream we're fine. We're okay. We're still together. We're so happy. We're so inlove. And it hurts. It's not helping me. It's giving me a reason to stay and to hold on, and it's just not right. Everytime I wake up I just can't stop these tears from falling down. I cry so hard until I fall asleep and then dream of you, resulting to also cry when I wake up. And I hate it. I really do! It's so frustrating! I'd rather have a nightmare than to dream with you again.