The pain of not getting the the whom you love is really too much... yes i did fall in love again this shit happened again in my life. And this time strangely i fell in love with the one who will never be mine. isn't it painful??
Lets start from the beginning this started a year back when i got my new crush, i was excited as it was only a crush then i told this to joyi my bff. But how come slowly this crush was getting a hard core place in my heart. He have a coffee shop in my lane and I know him since I was in 9th standard. I really wanted to talk to him for this reason i searched him in facebook, he was there i sent him friend request but he didn't accept it.
Every night of mine goes standing in the balcony watching him in his shop, closing it and going back home, i am no where in his life but i really want to make a small place there only, nothing much do i want. i really don't have the guts to go and talk to him i even collected his number from his shop but unfortunately this was not in whatsapp. Every day while returning home my eyes search him.. everyday i take a lots of excuses to go out and see him. Seeing him is like feel like heaven, even though he never talks with me but i feel happy. Slowly I developed a pain in heart a pain that I felt many years back... Again that same pain everyday I wished him talking with me but this never happened...
Atlast something happened that helped me indeed i came across his friend who gave me his whatsapp number. I was so very excited I can't tell.
Now I got the guts to text him, I texted him.... But.... Got no reply....
Next day he saw my text and replied.."yippppeeeeeeee" he replied atlast my dreams were seeming to be true.. My heart beats they were going faster.. This thing never happened before yes never.. but this sweet beginning never had a sweet ending.....
He only accepted my friendship but also his friend told me he had a girlfriend, but this was not my problem because i really started loving him, whether he is with me or with someone else this never matters.. But the problem was he never comes online he is too busy with his work.. after that day almost a week passed but no response came.
"Kya hua???".. this was his reply after I send him a smiley a week later.. Again the same happiness clinched my heart and this time this was really happening he was talking with me indeed, and also called me that night this was the first time when i received the phone and said "Hello" to him, other times i only used to call him and listen his voice.. with tears in my eyes....
We talked for almost 2 hrs, he told me all about him his family his annoying girlfriend to never allows him to make friend and much more... and he also offered me a ride for next morning,, this was going too much i felt like this was a beginning of a friendship that would atleast give me peace... but i was wrong...
Next morning i was on his scooty's back, this feeling was awesome.. yes i love him i really do i felt in heart, but will never tell him i will only be his good friend. This was the end of my happy days.....
I don't know why he is ignoring me since that day... doesn't text me.. Doesn't call me.. If i call him, he says "Abhi busy hae baad me call karte hae".. But he never called back.
That night I called him, he said"khana kha ke call karta hun"... He did after 1hr and said "Avi i am tired so kal baat karte hae" .... He never gave a second thought for whom I was waiting till 3 a.m in the night..
From that day I text him but he hardly replies.. He is deliberately avoiding me I really don't know why.. Every morning when i go wake up, and every night when I go to sleep i promise no to call him text him again but these promises are lost in my heart and I again text for nothing..
What I wanted??? Only his friendship but this was too much for him.. It would have been better if he never talked with me never being my one day friend.. Ignorance of someone for whom we fell is really painful.. Tears automatically role down my eyes don't know why..
I still stand in my balcony watching him in the hope some day he will reply my texts someday he will call me.. Someday he will see me... Someday he will again laugh with me as he did that day in the phone..
But that someday never comes.. Will never come.. This is how one sided love ends...
My friends say to forget him some say i will forget him, but my heart say "He is mine in my dreams.. may be he will never accept me but I accepted him.. "