Aurthor's notes : Based on an incident that happened today, which made the day for some of my friends as they had burst out laughing and taking my case. But they didn't really get the seriousness of the issue, which kind of disappointed me. This incident could have costed somebody's future life, or the power to give life, hoping my best that you are getting the vibe. So I have decided to put it under a graver light, the light of truth, in the form of this note.It is time that my friends grew up. Guys seriously, things like these aren't funny anymore. Especially if they started happening more frequently.
Readers should be prepared for cynicism, sarcasm, over exaggeration, bad hindi etc etc.
They told me, that I was being an unnecessary whiner. That I was dampening the mood of the 'adda'.
But I didn't care, because today, I found out the evil and the heartless person that I was about to become, or I could become.
All I needed was a bag full of 'kanda' and 'gajar', to accomplish the above.
And steal away the future joy of fatherhood from some random lad, walking by, quite innocently.
This is the story of just another day at an engineering college where sad things happen. By sad things, I usually refer to waking up as early as 7:55 AM, and somehow managing to reach the classroom by 7:59 AM, looking about as fresh as a spoilt tomato.
Not a very refreshing sight for the surly professor, who at least didn't kick you out for being a minute early. The rule was to be there at least five minutes before he did. Quite the expectation which we usually failed to meet anyway, causing us to ultimately end up getting a reputed and a well high-lighted spot on the defaulter's list.
But once in every blue moon, miracles do happen, and today was such a day.
Now that you have crossed the first hurdle of the day, don't get too cocky, I told myself.
As what comes next is, keeping awake.
Basically this involved purporting an expression that said “yes professor Dickson, I do give a damn about what you say”, and was not as easily done, as it was said.
This could in fact be considered the most difficult job in one's engineering weekday, and usually involved bearing through a series of kinds of torture, such as lengthy lectures about things you least cared about, slides with complex formulae and derivations that almost made you hurl, the cool and pleasant breeze blowing in through the wide open window out of which, one could see the clear blue sky, the birds chirping, the greenery and in short, a paradise next to the Eden's that called out your name in the tongue of the ancient alluring whisper enticing your will to melt away . . .
And a lot more being inflicted upon the poor dears stranded in the middle of a sad and sodden classroom.
At around 5, you finally get to hear the most blissful, heavenly sound , as if Jesus himself was playing the harp from above.
The final bell that signalled the end to another boring and an utterly non-productive day.
But then followed the extra sessions including meetings and projects and coaching classes and so many other things you were forced to be involved with.
All in all, I'd like to say, forgive the rant, but those were the thoughts that I was especially harbouring at the time of the incident, when finally, at 9 PM, I decided to take a break and go outside to buy myself some veggies.
Healthy diet is a must, but hardly ever stuck to. So I had started afresh, remaking my 88th diet list comprising of all sorts of vegetables that I was least fond of.
Somehow carrots and onions found themselves on the top. (Actually I do like onions. But I hate carrots). And the quantity that I had jotted down beside each of them was nothing less than half a kg.
And so, with my shopping list, I ventured out to the nearest grocery store.
Along the way, I met a friend, with whom I struck up a conversation about the things I have mentioned above.
For those who don't know, engineering kids are big time whiners. And damn right they had the right to whine. The sufferings that they go through, are nothing less than the literal meaning of the song 'Highway to Hell'.
So whenever one engineering kid met another, especially after a while, they complained, and thus kept each other updated. About life, the universe, engineering, and in general.
And there was always this competition acting up based on who was dealing with the greater shit.
And each of them thought that they had the upper hand. Always.
But the point is, these sort of conversations were so enticing and involving, that they made you unaware of where you were, how loudly you were talking, the stares that you were receiving because of using so many cuss words, or maybe a teacher had just passed by and you didn't even notice as you kept running that loud mouth of yours, and which would cost you eventually, and so on.
And whilst the time flew and I went on conversing more, I was hardly aware of the speed of my pace, as I waded through the crowded foot path. Neither was I aware of the speed with which I swung the bag full of vegetables.
“And you know what that professor told us? He told us to bloody write the whole assignment three times and only then he would allow us to attend his lab! Such a hypocrite! Condescending son of a-!”
THUD.
That made us halt, and which was soon followed by one of the most agonizing squeals of pain.
“OWWWWW!”
The poor dear was bent over, clutching his crotch in pain. He must have been of around the same age.
I was still holding my bag full of onions and carrots and other vegetables, which was swinging guiltily by my side.
As soon as I realised what I had done, I flustered over as we ran to the guy showering him with 'sorry's at the top of our voices. But that hardly made any difference, as the pain had rendered the guy deaf for the next few minutes.
Luckily for us, the guy wasn't the angry sort, and was quite polite, and accepted our apology with a small smile, telling us that it happens all the time. I wondered how many ladies out there did what I had done, on a regular basis. Or perhaps the poor fellow was really not that lucky.
In conclusion to the episode, many apologies and niceties later, we bade the poor guy who almost had his fatherhood sacrificed to half a kg of onions and another half of carrots, goodbye.
And with that I would like to say that even though this note is a complete waste of time, every word of it is true. All in all, stupid things do happen, and are just one of those 'perks' of an engineering life.
And I'm a cynic by birth.
Anyway thank you for giving this a read. If it sucks, which I think it partly does because I was too bored to come up with anything better, I really don't care and I'm telling this in a very positive and amicable way :P Whatever that means. Gah. Over and out.