I once had an argument with a friend about the stuffs I write. She advised me to stop writing depressing stuffs, and write something inspiring. She even did not understand the poems I wrote.
Me:Do you at all have any feelings? You are cold hearted.
Her:You can say that. But you know what, even the cold hearted people could melt when they come to the right hands.
Years passed and I lost contact with her like most of my friends. I lost touch with my writing as I came to know that these things are not meant for us. We , the middle class people need to work really hard to survive. If only I could realize that when I was in college when I wasted bulk of time in movies and writing stuffs. After completing my masters and knowing that doing a doctorate was not my cup of tea, I started preparing for all bank jobs, and teaching jobs. I had no idea how many unemployed people live in our nation until I was one of them standing in queue, applying for interviews and getting rejections. I managed to earn some pocket money through tuition and that helped me to survive some self respect in me.
Two years of repeated failures and finally managed to get a job in State Bank. I never ever wanted to be a clerk in a bank. The idea of a bank job freaked me out. But then I was selected among thousands and perhaps that is the support on which my entire life would depend. So I happily accepted fate and my new job.
So what comes next- of course marriage. That is what happens in a normal Indian family. My parents also wanted to give some news paper advertisement.On Sunday afternoons I found my mother circling in the matrimonial newspapers. They were crazy about it until I started blackmailing them that if they ever did that, I would move out of their home and never return. My mom started to haunt me that when I'll grow old, I'll have no one to look after, perhaps I'll be sent to an old age home, or maybe I'll die all alone. But these dialogues became too colloquial and I got used to these.
Years later.................
Call from an unknown number.
Me: Hello, who's this?
Her:Hello Arnav, what a relief. I thought you might have changed your number.
Me:Shruti? Oh my God, its Shruti right? How are you? Where have you been for such a long time?
Her: I never left Calcutta. Haha!! Anyway there's more to talk, can we meet today?
Me: Yeah sure, Cafeteria , 5:00 P.M.
Her: Okay.
While waiting at the cafeteria, I wondered if she looked different, perhaps I wont even recognize her. - There she was. She looked the same except she put on some more weight.
Me: So whats up?
Her: Lots to tell , but first take this.
She handed me her wedding card.
Me: Congratulations. You're getting married? Who's the guy? And who else is coming to the wedding.
Her: I've lost contact with most others. Shalini and you are the only people from school and very few from college.
Me: But I want to know about the guy. Who's he? From work? When did you fall in love, or did he fell in love? What are you doing nowadays?"
Her: Too many questions . Well I somehow managed to become a professor at the Indian Statistical Institute, but I wished for something better."
Me: Yeah, it is at least better than being a clerk in a bank.
Her:So what about you? Why was I not invited to your marriage?
Me: Are you crazy? I didn't marry.
Her: Any girlfriend?
Me: Nopes.
Her: I can never make a human out of you. When will you marry? You are already in your thirties. Its better that you get married soon , otherwise your son will call you grandpa.
Me: So you've already thought about kids huh? Anyway, years ago you told me something about hands, 'Right hands' I guess. So is he good with his hands. Haha!!
Her: Shut up. You've become so dirty. You need some girl.
Me: Yeah, I guess. I'm just waiting for the perfect girl to cross my life. I don't want a forced arranged marriage through newspaper advertisements and stuff
Her: Well, then mine is a 'forced arranged marriage', she laughed.
Me: What? You gave newspaper advertisements?
Her: Huh! Mom gave it. She was so crazy about my marriage. I didn't even think about it.
Me: If you don't want to get married why don't you just tell them.
Her: I thought about this, they're right. Its human life Arnav, come out from your bollywood era, see- this is how it looks. If you keep waiting, who knows perhaps you'll be waiting for your entire life.
Me: Have you met him?
Her: Yeah, he's an IRS officer. Anindya is a nice and humble person. Though we haven't talked much but I think we can make it to the marriage and then_ maybe till lifetime. Its been only 6 months that I know him, and I think he's a fine man.
Me: Okay, But I think you people should at least be sure if at all you love each other, else it won't be a perfect way to start a marriage. Anyway I'm no one to advice since I'm a bachelor.
Her: But you won't be. I want to see you getting engaged by this year.
Me: Okay, lets see. But hey, ask him about his hands and if that could melt you.
We both laughed.
The wedding went fine and she looked exceptionally beautiful on her wedding saree and the jewellery. She introduced me to Anindya who was indeed very polite and humble. I met Shalini after a long time and she was also getting engaged within six months. So the whole world was getting engaged then married and I would spend my spare time watching movies and writing nonsense. My parents grew worried about me but then they had nothing to do because it was totally my decision. I often came home drunk least realising how hurt they were. My room started filling up with beer bottles. I had nothing to do with life, just a worthless job was all I had. Everything turned out fake and meaningless. I went on several dates and that left me nothing but disgusted. Most of them were too practical, they talked about profession, career ,education, family which I hated. I always wished for a girl of her own dreams, of her life but all it came with were shopping, money, price tag.
10 years passed with another blink of an eye. I was in my forties when I met her in a shopping mall. She was surprised when she saw me.
Her: Hey, how are you doing?
Me: Fine, wait are they your kids?
Her: Yeah, this is Aayush, he's 8 and that's Sanjay he's 5. It's been such a longtime. We can meet sometime, after all we live in the same city.
Me: But life keeps us more busy and now you've more busy things in life.
Her: Yeah, but I can guess you still didn't marry. Why don't you go to the Himalayas and start meditating. Its good for health.
Me: That's a good idea.I'll think on it, haha! Anyway I'm getting late. We can catch up later, bye.
I was a daily drunkard then, but that night I didn't drink. I never knew why, but for the first time I felt that my parents were right. It was high time that I started a life, a marriage, a family. It is not always necessary that a perfect person will pass through your life. That may never happen and the wait will seem endless. The woman I marry might not be the way I wanted her to be, our thoughts may not match, maybe our love would never evolve the way I wanted but a bit of hard work and self sacrifice from both sides could make it work, and when there are kids they will make our bonding complete. Its through this course of happiness and hard times that we can ultimately see the sides of life. Life may not be as beautiful as we dream but we can make it seem one.