It's funny coz I thought it was just mere attraction...
But the moment we held hands, my frozen heart started melting... beating...
ticking...
like the time I once stopped
long ago has now been set.
Again, moving.
The butterflies in my tummy were just so familiar.
The warmth of your touch wasn't as foreign as it would be.
Your intense stares were lingering. That you were the only vivid color among all the colors fading in.
This ancient feeling
I have buried a long time ago.
Well it has now been awakened.
And I myself don't know even
how to tame my dragons that were now trying to devour my whole being.
I was scared.
At first, I was mad.
Not with you
but with my own self.
No matter how I deny.
No matter how tough I try to be.
No matter how fierce I may have been...
Everything was like a slap.
It was as fast as a snap.
Reality hit me hard.
Indeed.
I am falling in love...
Again.
It could've been happy.
Perhaps it should be.
It should've been merry.
It should've been bliss.
But I can't help but shed some tears.
I told myself to be careful.
I should've been.
To be cautious.
I should've pushed you away.
Well, I've been. For quite sometime.
And it's painful coz the moment I allowed myself to fall again...
Again, I crushed my heart as well.
How I wish I can take my whole heart back.
To glue all the broken pieces together.
To hold them tight even before they shatter into tinier pieces.
How I wish I can reset the time.
Back to the time when this Love was just mere like.
And to remind myself again and again.
To cut all my fed up fantasies
and just deal with the reality.
To the reality that...
You were in love...
Not with me
but with someone else.