Falling in love with you was one of the most unexpected moments I've ever felt. It maybe fast but who said loving has a time frame? It felt like I knew you for a long time before. Like I've known you even before I've met you.
Like time was just a number set by humans to limit our conversations. To signal that we need to go to bed and to leave everything in the hands of tomorrow.
I fell in love with you not because you're handsome.. smartass... humorous or rich. I fell in love with you simply because you've seen thru me. Like a glass. Like I'm your most favorite book to read. I fell in love with the whole you. Your issues. Your flaws. Your stupidity. Your faint reasons. Your undecipherable quality.
Your everything.
I've never been this close to any other Living soul out there.
With you I am happy.
I feel carefree. I feel it.
Your warmth and all.
It's like you're this radiant ball of sun slowly melting me away.
And a breath of fresh air amidst a growing crowd.
I never get tired of listening to your stories. Never get tired of looking at your littlest of all gestures. The way your lips twitch. Or the way your long eyelashes move when you're blinking. I never get tired of replying to your messages coz it felt like I got a lot of things to share too. I didn't care if I was staying up all night. If only I could extend the hours of the day, I would've surely done it everytime I was with you.
If only I could go back to that time and freeze it. Back to the time when I could still say you smile and laugh because of me.
You never failed to amaze me. And it felt like of all the people I've known, you're one of the few I have appreciated and have returned that feeling too.
I was aware you're gonna break my walls and gonna lead me on. At first I resisted. But later on I let you enter into my whole system already. I knew it was wrong. But I felt like it was the best thing to do that time.
I let you in.
Yes. I welcomed you.
It was my choice.
With you I am open. With you I can be vulnerable. With you I can be weird. I can smile. I can laugh. I can be crazy. That's why I was willing to break my rules. To try new things. To be brave for a bit.
But something was holding me back. It was guilt. Yes. It think it was. Coz I knew you were half hearted. You had hold backs too.
But I was starting to realize that I was feeling something more and something deep.
Something I am sure of.
But as I began to realize it. I've pushed you far away already. I pushed you to see if you will fight back and win me. To see if you have the same level of feeling that I have. Same amount of emotions. To know if you're willing to give it a try.
By then I've regretted that act of mine. I should've kept you Closer.
I should've held your hand tight.
And now...sadly...
you seem to change your feelings too fast. All I needed was time. Just a few of it. And now. Now that I fully realize everything.
You seemed to have drifted away.
I wanted to wish you'll come back. But I guess that was too much.
Coz now, your eyes are set for somebody else.
And I guess this love that grew will be again wasted.
This will just turn out to be my another tragic story.
I was Marked.
Scarred even.
But this time I knew
it was real Love
that I was actually feeling.