Dearest S.C.,
I still remember that beautiful night where I got drunk and spoke my heart out to my dearest friends - T & V. The influence of alcohol was so much that I went on talking for 2 hours. Yes the very same two hrs that night which forced my friends into making me realize my love for you.
2011 I suppose, the first time I heard your voice over phone. Such a beautiful voice indeed :) 4 years down the line I can't imagine we went from Strangers to Best Friends to Lovers (Love from your side was always unsure) to Strangers again. I've had the best and worst moments with you. Best made me want you more and more and worst made me understand you better.
Those 5 days when you came over, I treated you like my Wife. My parents adored you, my dad gave you my Audi to drive (Which he fucking never gives it to anyone!!), my mom cooked delicious things for you, my friends welcomed you with so much love and affection, etc. In all this, you din't notice but I did. You were still distracted by your 'casual date' back in Delhi. You were physically here but mentally there too. I hugged and kissed (on the cheeks) you every day and night just before you close your eyes and right after you open them. I took you out to places, made you eat delicious food, got you to clubbing, etc etc just to give you a glimpse of our life if atall we get married. And the night before you left you kissed (lips this time) me. WOW! You went back to Delhi and got more distracted as expected.
We had our discussion and you admitted about your feelings to me. I asked you a billion times to stop your casual dating with that guy and to let him know the truth. But no, you were scared that your next 6 months in college would be ruined because he will get to know the truth. Good Bullshit. I still trusted you BLINDLY.
All things broke apart on Valentine's Day. You wished me Valentine's Day but put up on Instagram boasting about your valentine being him. What kind of love is this? You secretly admit that you love me but want to show to the world that its him whom you love. I've never seen such a coward lover. What kind of love is this and which lover will accept that? Actually, you never loved. You just...
And when I blocked you everywhere it took you 5 long days to find that out. Were you sleeping? Oh wait! The bubble world. How could I forget that? And the best part - In your Goodbye message to me, you wrote - 'You shunned me out of your life and that shows my importance to you'. You needed a reason to leave right?
I can't believe I wrote a BLOG for you! Me and writing a blog ? Like I seriously had to question myself. Was I so Love Struck? I've done things which I never thought of. I crossed boundaries and limits with the only hope that you too would some day do the same for me when I needed you the most.
Either you're so dumb that you'll take generations to realize why I shunned you out or you know what you did and don't want to admit the truth. Remember always - Love does not wait, You fucking can't love two people at the same time and secretly loving me and showing to the world something else does not make any sense. Poor guy whom you're dating does not know that you're about to chuck him out and find an alternative. Pity him!
Perhaps, you are busy in your 'Bubble' World right now - Enjoying the carefree life, Not giving a f**k about me. I hope when your bubble world is pricked by someone you don't fall too hard to the ground. You always said - 'You deserve a better girl'. Well you said something right.
I hope you read this someday and Realize what you did to me (If you are so dumb to realize on your own).
I placed my BROKEN HEART in front of you just to find it SHATTERED more...
*What Goes Around Baby, Definitely Comes Around*
Take Care and Thank you for making me realize that I deserve someone better.
Once yours,
N.S.