I woke up in the middle of the night, sweating profusely with teary eyes and a throbbing heart. I couldn't find the water bottle that's usually on the bedside table. It was when I crossed the closet, my heart skipped a beat. It was my face. That long forgotten face of mine which I dearly hated gazed upon me from the closet's man-sized mirror.
In sheer disbelief, I rubbed my face only to find that the mask you gave me wasn't there any more. The mask that covered my entire face and had a smile on it. My balance shattered into a million pieces. I'm thoroughly used to that mask, so much so that I despise my actual face now. I stood still for I know not how long. I was startled. May be it's in the closet, may be I haven't looked hard. I threw all my clothes out, looked under the pillow, and on the table beside. It wasn't there; it wasn't anywhere. Let alone office, I don't have the courage to even step out of the house. How could I face that kid next door who waves her hand everyday as I pass by. She might not even recognise me without the mask.
What am I gonna do without the mask? I remember nothing anymore of my life before you gifted me that damn mask. I'm afraid of facing people without it. I see fear decimating the last trace of confidence on my face. Oh! I remember now. It was you that I last spoke to, before the twilight. It was a lengthy talk on how I should move on and how I should be more of myself. I don't understand a bit of it, as I've considered the mask as a part and parcel of myself. You were genuine enough to confront that you were going to wreck me and I was not serious enough to decipher that.
The mask that you bestowed me with, the mask that had the smile, the mask that kept me strong, the mask of happiness completely waned off the moment you left. You fenced me, let me bloom and took back the fence when you left. I cannot complain as it is yours to take. But my stakes are high. I pray to you, do loan me the mask for sometime. I'll go out there and be back in no time. Let me finish off the few things that I have to. I shall return the mask thence. There isn't any other way.
With a deep sigh, I pull myself together. I've got to admit, or infact reiterate that I'm so used to that mask, for I ain't comfortable to project myself without it. I know this was exactly what you asked me to come out from. I take no pride being a defeatist but I take no shame either. It's just that I am tired, tired of it all.