To the person who never had the courage to love me

We were liars and cowards imprisoned in other people's hands.

Loving you is perilous, it is like I'm in the center of Colosseum all loaded guns through me and you were there standing, looking at me dying with your chest pumping and saying you have to save me.

I didn't know how we easily get comfortable with each other- it just happened, like how waves tossed in the ocean. We shared things, we had endless talks about life at night- how was your family- how much you love food.

But like any other stories, the coin we're holding flipped on the other side- a Ferris Wheel in amusement parks where it let people experience the view on top and later left them back to the usual scenario. You made me feel like I'm just a speck of dust within your galaxy.

I still remember the color of the shirt you wore the first time I saw you- pink stripes!, how you mock the way I introduce myself to you, how I get intimidated by the way you move, how I envy your patience in reading a bunch of books, and how I loved you for being you.

I do keep things, still have those in my closet- the receipt of the first thing you bought for me, the tie you used on our pillows. I faced all the consequences of staying, I fearlessly accepted the stabs from the utter bullshit people.

I gave you the love that you deserve even though it didn't reciprocate. But it's okay. I'm okay. I hope you are too. You don't have to worry about me anymore.

I got sleepless night thinking about you. I tried so many times, I said I will never get tired, but I'm wrong. I get tired- tired of understanding the situation, why you didn't tell me everything, why you have to keep things bottled up, and why you make everything so hard for me, for us.

But you know what? I am still here. I will forever be here... whenever you are ready.

In the end of the day, we all are all just the same people who want to love and to be loved in return. Let's cheers for the people we are today, and to the great people we will be.