I was this beautiful, happy go-lucky girl four years back. Nothing could break my strong heart or at least i thought so. Well had some proposals, many crushes and many many close friends. I would even laugh at people who told "Love is a beautiful pain". Pain? And Beautiful? WTH? Nothing broke me UNTIL he came into my life. I did not have the slightest thought that he is going to change my life forever and ever. He was the first guy i had gone out with, fought with, the first guy to ever let my emotions out(be it tears, happiness, possessiveness, love, affection) and the ONLY person i ever missed.
As days went by, i started falling in love with him. By this i mean, i literally fell before i could even realize or stop myself. Love became beautiful and so did I. His happiness became my happiness. His sadness mine and he became my ADDICTION. At the first place, i did not want to love at all. At the second place, i was too cautious of the complications. But it was too late, so i decided to risk it; religion, caste,language. Guys get too close with girls, awaken her love, play with her emotions and finally reply FRIENDS. And that's the reply I got back. I was shattered, its more than hard to go back on sad memories. Like all these happy ending movies, i too waited for him to miss me, to realize his love for me. and come back to me. But i guess those happen only in MOVIES. Days became months, months became years. I waited and waited. It wasn't my mistake to fall in love, it was my mistake to fall in love with the wrong person. Yes today after four years i am smiling. I don't talk about it anymore. But there is this fake hope, this fake smile and fake bonds that keep me going. Then there are days of depression which makes me cry for no reason. Sometimes i feel so heavy, so pathetic, i want to cry out loud. I want to sleep. I want to run faster and faster in the dark and fall down to ground and cry. I want a break and then it doesn't happen. I wish for miracles to happen.
Some people are addicted to alcohol, some to drugs, some to weird habits, some other to coffee. And here i am ADDICTED to YOU.
Maybe Loving you was the biggest mistake in my life..!!!