Wishful Thinking

‘So where did you go last night?’ she asked as I chugged my second pint.

‘Place du Casino’ I smiled.

‘Again?’

‘Yeeeeaaah….I’m wondering why!’ I replied as I sank back on the maroon leather couch. On the first floor of the smoke filled dingy space, I could spot tipsy bodies surrounding our dimly lit glass table. The silhouettes of curvaceous glasses more half-filled than empty, were screaming celebration.

‘You know I studied psychology during my graduation, right? Dreams are nothing more than the projection of your subconscious.’ She started again with her rational reasoning.

Of course you did.

I inwardly eye rolled. ‘Yeah? Well could be. But how would you explain me knowing the names of these places and having their vivid imagery pictured in my head without even visiting them in the first place?’

‘I don’t know. For starters, you could have watched it in a movie or a video that got imprinted in your subconscious which filled broader details and then your imagination took over and did the rest. Haven’t you watched inception, Duh?!’

‘That one’s done. Here, have this.’ A sturdy arm came from the side with a glass filled with translucent brown liquid. ‘Stop with the faces. Come-on drink it, it’s my birthday’

‘Of course’ I smiled and took the drink. Not that I was very fond of Old-Fashioned but this was the quickest way of getting his drunken ass out of my face. Plus, I hate it when somebody interrupts a conversation, especially when it’s her.

‘You might be right about that and you might be wrong. It’s still a theory not scientifically proven.’ I continued as I watched my friend eyeing suspiciously, waiting for me to take a sip. I touched the rim of the glass and wet my lips with the ice-cold liquid. I pressed my lips against each other, looked at the birthday boy who smiled and moved towards his next prey, with a new set of cocktails in each hand.

What an asshole!

‘Oh but psychology is science! It can be proven with experiments and observations’ she responded swiftly.

‘Yeah well, we are not getting into this right now. It drains my energy and you know there’s no winning when it comes to you.’

She chuckled.

‘But seriously, I’m so glad you are here. I wouldn’t have gone through this evening without you. I mean look at all these tipsy fucks.’ I irked as I glanced at the intoxicated bodies dancing, drinking, falling all over the place and each other. ‘Look at these jerks, hating their life all day and escaping it all night. Nobody gives a shit about his birthday. Everybody’s here for the drinks. Hey look at the guy in brown jacket. I think he passed out.’ I chuckled as I took a picture of a snoozing body lying on the left couch with one shoe missing.

‘Oh god, is this party lit or what!’ she winked and laughed.

‘I hope you meant that sarcastically!’

‘Well of course. If it would have been fun, you wouldn’t have stuck around talking to me.’

‘What do you mean?’ I asked as I picked my drink and took a real gulp this time.

‘You know what I mean. You are supposed to be with your friends out there. Instead you are sitting at the far end corner of the table avoiding real conversation. Why are you not joining them on the dance floor?’

‘Because I don’t want to dance!’

She rolled her eyes.

‘So yeah, about my dream from last night. These episodes are getting regular now. Maybe it’s a sleazy way of the universe telling me to visit Monaco.’

‘Well, isn’t Universe too specific about the location!’ she squinted her eyes and smirked. ‘One or the other, you should go to that place. It’s majestic.’

‘Don’t tell me you’ve already been there and hiding it away from me all along?!’

‘Of course not. My friend has. But I will go to Monte Carlo someday.’

‘Hey. Quick thought.’ I almost jumped off the couch, ‘How...about….’ I readjusted myself on the seat. ‘We...You know, You..and..I...Maybe we go together. What do you think?’

Was it too soon to ask?! SHIT

There was a pause for good two minutes. She might have drifted to another thought or something but I kept my eyes hooked for an answer. I knew we never discussed this but I also knew deep down that she too had wanted to do that for a long time.

‘Sure.’ her yellow reflection smiled.

OHMYFUCKINGGOD!

‘Perfect! Now the only thing left to do is decide the date and time. ’ I tried to remain as calm as I could or at least portray so.

‘Oops! Sorry’ few drops of unidentified booze splashed from atop.

Fucking hell!

I clenched my teeth, closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I didn’t know what made me want to punch this careless retard on the fucking face - the reason that my brand new chinos were stained or that we were interrupted again.

I felt a hand pressing against my right shoulder. A slender figure in a black jumpsuit staggered from behind and sat at the couch adjacent to mine. She furrowed her well sketched brows and put her hand over her red fuller lips.

‘I am sooooo sorry. Here take this.’ She leaned smoothly against the table and stretched her hand to reach the box of tissues lying unattended in the middle. My raging eyes caught a glimpse at the fall of the low neckline of her dress and upon realizing I quickly moved them away towards the bobbing heads on the dance floor.

A claustrophobic cluster was stitched near the DJ’s podium where distant flying hands and erratic bodies were swaying to Kygo’s new track. Somehow they looked less annoying now, these people. I looked at the man of the hour in the black jacket dancing furiously, missing every beat by fraction of seconds. Well, I do respect him for standing on his feet let alone dancing after drinking since the past two hours. I guess everyone is excused for boozing irrationally and behaving like an ass on their birthday. I mean look at him, dancing and drinking like it’s the end of the world. He is not such a cunt really. Maybe I’m too harsh on him. After all, we’ve been friends since high school.

I suddenly felt a hand pressing and rubbing my thigh.

WHAAAT

‘....the hell!’ I squeaked and shifted in my seat.

‘Oh, I’m sorry, I thought I should clean it up. ’ she withdrew her hand smoothly and looked at me with a hint of a smirk forming on her pretty little face. There was something in her eyes though, something alluring about her and no, it wasn’t the result of alcohol mixing with my blood but I had no intentions of figuring it out, not today.

‘It’s alright.’ I took the tissue which she extended and dabbed the remaining struggling droplets.

‘By the way, I’m Arya’, she smiled and stretched her arm.

Not interested.

‘Neel’ I caught it lightly mid air, just to be polite.

‘You, Sid’s friend right? The one who went to St. Columba’s with him?’

I wish I attended a different school.

‘Hmm’ I replied as I mindlessly scrolled through my social news feed, waiting. We both sat like that for few minutes. She was scanning me from top to bottom with her lips parted, occasionally turning into a circle but closing down again, with her teeth biting her lower lip. I’ll be honest. I was feeling like an asshole for dealing this situation horribly but with every anxious atom inside my body, I was praying for her to leave me alone.

‘Sorry I got a call from my sister. Yes, where were we? Oh ya, setting up the travel plans. What do you think about three months from now?’ she finally affirmed.

‘I’ll have to check my schedule. I’ll let you know.’ I replied.

‘Alright’ She smiled.

Ok. Look cool. Wait till tomorrow to agree.

‘Poor guy! He is missing out all the fun here’ Arya glanced at the drunk body spread across the couch. ‘Wait...Is he missing a shoe?’ she squinted her eyes and chuckled.

‘Yeah’

‘Holy Shit! This is hilarious.’

‘Yeah’

‘How long has he been passed out there?’

‘Since I arrived.’

‘So...Do you dance?’ she asked

Please don’t do this.

I shook my head without looking up. I was feeling bad inside, anxiously opening various apps on my phone and scrolling through. It’s easier to pretend you are busy than gathering courage to do what’s polite and decent.

She lingered for another few minutes, occasionally running her fingers through her hair and checking her phone. It feels bad when you have to face rejection after multiple attempts, it’s worse when you are drunk. I know that because I’ve been there until I found a better recess.

The music was getting louder, probably just for me and I knew this drink started working its charm.

It wasn’t long before she realized I was much more interested in the flashing bright screen than her radiant face. She stood up without saying a word and left the table to join the crowd at the dance floor. Her abandoned drink lay unattended in front of me and I was really hoping she’d get another one to calm her down.

I felt like a jerk even though I couldn’t do anything about it. I picked up my phone and sent another text - ‘Wish you were here!’

God! How much I miss her.

‘Oh babe but I am. Remember, we are just a screen away.’ she replied instantly.