“No, it can’t be,” he mumbled as he trudged along the vacant corridor. He saw two murky silhouettes facing his direction though unsure whether to cower in fear or continue walking. As he passed by the wooden benches, the lights had snuffed out of the lampposts and the path were shrouded with darkness. He camouflaged in the bushes and recognized two familiar faces. He was in dazed and sudden petrification. His eyes blinked with pure hatred as if an inglenook has started to build inside him.
But before he burst in anger, a sonorous growl pierced the air. The effervescent clouds became dark and shriveled. The atmosphere was blanketed with fear.
“Run” his instincts told him. His limbs were numbed from hitting the asphalt though he didn’t dare to look behind. He hit an alleyway, he passed a tunnel which undeniably had the smell of petrichor for the ground was mossy. His shirt was drenched in sweat, but that was a minor part of the problem. Something was chasing him; something unmistakably grotesque and ginormous with howl like thousands of knives piercing a stone.
The running was tedious, it made him dizzy. He wanted to stop and protest but a small part of his brain kept on mumbling “You should go, nowhere is safe” which urged him not to pause. He turned left and found himself stuck; the way was barricaded with rusting metal doors. The handle was embedded with lock. He couldn’t climb that high, one wrong move would break him so he gazed around. Out of serendipity, he found an opening on the right side out of the wall. There was a passage in the last row of brick houses.
There was a tension in the ambience; the sky became a whirlpool of black mist. There was someone lingering in the facades of houses.
“Thump, thump, thump” the sound echoed through the whole place. The ground shook as he ran through the only passage. His mind was focused on how to get away with the “thing” that was pursuing him. He ran and ran steadfastly as the world became blurry lights, not knowing anything but escape. Three meters, two meters, it was near when a prevalent sound shattered the silence. He collided with something thick yet fragile.
Tiny shrapnel of glass flew over the place and a disturbing smell, no, it was the smell of blood, prevailed in the air. Blisters and wounds lithered all over his body but thanks, for his consciousness was very much prominent.
This time, the sound got louder like millions of prancing lion, ready to pound its prey. Everything around him shuddered, the ground cracked which opened into an oblivious crevasse. An ineffable presence swirled in the atmosphere. It was massive, it clawed its way out of an unfathomable blackness. It had talons sharper than an assassin’s blade with hints of plasma. Panic surged inside him, there’s no way out. There he was, helplessly decapitated, falling directly in the arms of death. Stream of tears rushed in his face, dampening his cheeks. He was unable to utter a single word. He turned around and embrace the ephemeral life he had lived.
The roar was very near, maybe two feet from where he stood. Slashing everything in its way, making the land rumble. A sinister laugh merged with the churning storm that made the whole scene spookier and devilish. A whip of sultry air touched his back and he knew it was the end. The razor sharp claw sliced through him which sent an unsettling sensation across his veins. A deep gash appeared on his left chest, the part where his heart should be. He looked helpless and terribly bad. He fell on his knees yet he managed to look directly and realized that the glass he had collided with was no merely a glass, it was a mirror. He happened to take a glance on the monster for the first time. He expected it to appear ghoulish and surreal but no, it was ethereal and angelic.
Where those piercing reptilian eyes should be, were a perfect pair of honeysuckle- tinged eyes and thick eyebrows. Its mouth where the huge canine teeth and fangs should appear was completely replaced with the reddest lips that would make Snow White jealous. The monster’s face was effortlessly handsome as if he was carved from stone and had become alive. And there, he knew he was doomed. Was this even a monster? Confusion spun on his mind, maybe his own eyes were playing tricks with him, but no. All of this was true.
His mind continued to whirl like creaking machine parts, it made him uncomfortable. He somehow recognized the monster though the memory was murky and blur. There was something familiar with its feature and all of a sudden, everything had fallen into place. It was the same monster that haunt him whenever he was angry or sad or depressed. It was the same vicious monster that devastated his vague nightmares.
The monster was no one but himself. He was the monster.
The sharp claws that pierced his heart were nothing but meaty fingers trying to penetrate his chest yet only managed to peel off the skin. The sound of the growl doesn’t belong to the wolves or the lions, it came from his throat, screeching for help. Thanks the odd for nothing serious had happened.
It was his own monster tearing its way out of the sturdy ribcage, seeking for freedom.
Hatred had intensified and urged the monster to flee when he saw two figures looming in the wall a while ago. They weren’t just strangers, the girl was his former lover. The girl that manipulated him to do such dark deeds, losing himself in the process. The girl that took away everything from him, shattering him into uncountable fragments. It was the girl that introduced darkness to his eyes, making a monster out of him.
He was very sorry for himself. He let his emotions dominate and reign over his body. At least he had chosen the right thing to do, to run away before the monster inside him torment his past lover.
Weariness swelled all over his system, making him exhausted. His eyes started to weigh a ton. All of his energy was completely drained, he cannot move easily and the experience made him haggard. The filthy pavement cannot pass for a bed but he couldn’t fight the urge to take a nap. His head hit the sidewalk and he began snoring.
This time, his dreams were vivid.
“Free me” whispered a sharp yet mellifluous voice. It came inside his chest yet he ignored the sound.
“Let go of me, it does you no good” it whispered again, this time, his heartbeat thumped faster. His insides pummeled, he was unable to breath. He felt his insides will burst out soon, three, two…..
“Stop it” he yelled as he opened his eyes and stared at the starry skies. He heaved a deep sigh and began to decipher his dreams.
Tears trickled down his face. It wasn’t an easy decision but he needed to. In order to get rid of his own monster, he should let hatred, fear, jealousy and the memory of his lover abandon his body. How would you able to forget someone who was the reason why you’re hurt and in pain?
There was still a portion of his heart that cared for the girl and the idea of him, letting her go, messed his sanity. He hoped his decision would sort things out.
Or worsen?
"I am not going to release my cruel monster nor destroy it” he managed.
“I am taming my own demons. I will feed it with resentment and betrayals. I will let it devour my whole essence.” He mumbled as he walked toward the gloomy pathway, his eyes flaring with bitterness. He left a howl of disgust and vanished completely.
A thin sheet of creased paper was lying on the ground.
“I promise myself vengeance” it said in a cursive writing, a somber reminder of an easy yet perilous choice he had made.