No, we are no longer the same. The love that brought me back to life years back is now killing me. The "you" that saved me from hell is now dragging me back to my cage. The happiness you gave me when I met you almost two years ago is now haunting me. I am in the memory lane of our past. I am wondering what happened to us.
The attention that you gave me back then is now no longer to be found. The laughter you used to share has been replaced by silent tears in the middle of the night. The solemn moments are now fading away. You can even sleep without me in your arms. You can go to sleep without asking if I am alright.
I never questioned your love for me eversince. I am way too confident about your intentions, until recently. I never had the courage to ask you if you still love me because I am afraid to hear the answer.Layered lies has been given to me and I hate to hear another lie from you.
I tried to end this relationship multiple times. You've been declining my decision and kept asking me to stay. I decided to give it another shot because I thought you really are interested in keeping me. How come I cannot feel your intention to win me back. It's like I am the only one wanting for this relationship to move forward. I am getting tired of expecting that we can still make things work. I am just getting tired of understanding you.
Yes, I love you to the moon and back. Yes ,I care for you more than I care for myself. I put your needs before my needs. I put your happiness before my happiness. Now, I am losing mg grip. You've been treating me badly, I hope you can see it. I hate to wake up one day and realise that it is no longer worth it. I have changed myself for you even if I know that I didn't have to. I tried to make things work the way you wanted it to be just to please you and I guess I am reaching my boiling point. I am not upset that you cannot see my effort, I am sad that I have to do things out of my league that to please you.
I am already running out of bullet. I do not know if I can last another day with you.You said that relationship is supposed to be a teamwork. How come at this very moment I am the only one playing. Where are you ? Oh, you're just here yet I cannot feel you. You're beside me yet I cannot feel your presence. This saddens me more . This is just choking me.
I hope one day I can still tell to myself that you are indeed mine. That you're love is real and that I am the only one you'd like to be with for the rest of your life. I feel so pathetic . I feel so depressed yet I still want you so I just need to bear with it a little bit longer. Just a little bit of more.