Do you remember when you were still a kid?
When assignment was your biggest problem, playmates were your best friends, and games were your paradise.
5 years old. Yhe age when you'll realize that you're alive.
That yes, I can move my feet, I can feel my hands, I can control my body.
But. What's the real importance of this all?
But wait, you are just 5 years old!
So why would you even bother asking that questions? It's not important...
That time.
Then years passed.
And in just a blink, you are suddenly 12 years old.
A grade 5 or grade 6 student where your duty is to passed your exams. To have friends, to enjoy life, to be happy.
Yes, to be happy.
You're always telling yourself that you need to be happy...
Always need to be happy.
Because that's our real goal in this world right? To be happy.
To experience laughing, smiling, enjoying life.
But if you really are happy. Have smiles on your faces.
Why are you still hoping for so much more? For something better?
You are happy now! So why are you still telling yourself that you need to be happy if you already are?
Tell me, were you just pretending?
Then high school came, the start of the real world. The reality.
The time when you need to go out of your shell and let them see who you are but you are still shy.
No. You can't. You won't. You can't go out of your shell.
But you don't have any choice...
Because reality will push you to do it no matter how hard you want to stay safe and sound inside your shell...
It will push you.
The world is so scary. Monsters in your dream can be seen in reality.
The world you always thought as a fantasy can be your biggest nightmare because life, was never been better. It was never been good.
Never good enough...
And now, as we look at the mirror, did we ever think about how ashamed are we, asking ourselves;
"Do I really know you? Or you are just some kind of pretentious thing who want to stay pretending because it's the easiest way? To pretend?"
See? Do you really know your self?
And your answer for that question will be;
"Yes! Of course! I know myself! I'm the one who controls it, I'm the one who made it that way. I'm the captain of my own ship. So why in a hundred ways would I not know myself? "
Then after you answer, you will smile. You'll smile right? Because that's how it supposed to be... And not because of that's what you really feel.
And did you noticed? You're pretending again. That even you, fooled yourself.
Because deep inside, you have this statement in your mind about;
"I should be the master of my own ship. It should be what it supposed to be. But why does it feel like I'm not that one who controls it anymore? As time goes by, why does it feel like I'm the prisoner of my own made paradise? Why does it feel like slavery? Why?"
And as you look closer at the mirror, look deeper at your eyes, I assure you...
You will see a hollow and empty smile.
See? While you are smiling at everyone, you're brain start to make it's own questions that even you can't understand nor answer.
Because the truth is, not all questions has it's own answers.
That sometimes, it's better to just stay curious and never to answer the questions.
They always say that curiosity kills the cat, always, kills the cat.
Then, if it's really true.
Why are we still asking questions? Finding something? Searching for something new?
Know why? Because people were stubborn.
Stubborn enough to want what is dangerous. What they cannot have. Of what is forbidden.
So please... Stop. Just stop...