Divorce after 20 years of marriage

Marriage is a deep social, spiritual, and emotional bond that unites two people and everyone around them. Over time, it forms the foundation for a larger family group, especially if children and grandchildren came from the union. It’s hard to imagine you’ve been married for many years, and, one day, your spouse announces he or she wants a divorce. Suddenly, it feels like you don’t know your spouse or recognize what he or she is saying. It feels like you’ve recently been living with a stranger to feel this huge divide between you suddenly. It is a significant change that can upend your whole life and make you question your self-efficacy. It takes soul-searching to know if you should fix the relationship or cut your losses and move on.

What Does Life Resemble After Divorce?

When you’re newly separated or divorced, your world feels like it is ending, at least what you’ve known for many years, but it can also feel like you’re starting a new chapter. You find opportunities to make new friends and consider dating again when you’re ready. It’s wise to work through your mixed feelings about divorce before starting the dating game again.

Gone through that and came out a new person? Feeling like its time to find someone else to share a life’s experiences? A dating app is a quick way to meet singles in your target age group. Joining a dating service means creating a new persona and talking to strangers. While it might feel strange to go on dates, new conversations that start one of the sites from dating for seniors review can teach you about yourself and expand your social network. It takes time to find a romantic partner, but the journey is important for your personal growth.

What is the Divorce Rate?

For years, U.S. government agencies have collected data on divorce. It helps the government understand the changing composition of households and plan public programs to fit the population’s needs. Among many age brackets, the divorce rate has actually been going down in recent years. Therefore, it might surprise you that Baby Boomers have the highest divorce rate in the U.S.

According to recent research, the divorce rate for people over 65 years old has grown three times over since 1990. This means more people per 1,000 married persons are ending their marriages in this demographic. The newest rate calculated in 2015 was 10 adults per 1,000 per the National Center for Health Statistics and the Census Bureau. The 1990 statistic was 5 adults per 1,000 married persons. Therefore, the rate doubled over 25 years.

Why Do Couples Separate After 2 Decades of Marriage?

For a couple that’s been together long enough to raise a functional adult human being (or even a few), divorce is a big lifestyle change. When they separate into different households, everyone in their social circle feels the effects, especially close family members, friends, colleagues. And no-one’s feelings can compare to what are couple’s children are going through.

Everyone feels like they must take sides, but that’s not necessary. They must accept that now the pair everyone knew can now be reconsidered as two individuals. It takes time for two adults to redefine their identities as single people.

Yet separation is the best way to handle things if people lose their emotional connection, friendship, intimacy, or other aspects of their partnership. Or, they might decide they mostly want to be alone. It can leave the other partner feeling abandoned and hurt, mainly if they got used to a kind of a “frenemy” relationship, while the other partner couldn’t handle the negativity in their life. Some common reasons people divorce are:

● They have grown apart.

● There has been infidelity by one or both spouses.

● They don’t agree on important things like money management or retirement plans.

● They are tired of being in an abusive situation.

● They are fed up with their partner’s mental health issues, addictions, or poor health.

● There is no intimacy.

Still, the separation after a major factor like the ones above can lead to both partners’ growth in the near future.

How Do Kids Take the Divorce News?

In many cases, adult children take the news of divorce worse than young kids. Children take cues from their parents on how they should feel about it. On the one hand, they resent their parents’ long-standing relationships are about to change, which can impact living arrangements. On the other hand, they’re glad their parents are moving past conflict and other problems and trying something new. Deep down, kids want their parents to be happy.