Experiment

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I really don’t know why I keep feeling like this. Everyday it gets thougher, my chest gets heavier, my mind gets louder, my eyes get wetter.I really don’t know wha’ts happening to me. In this exact same time, while I’m writting my feelings, my anxiety is killing me. I don’t know what to do. I can’t take this for much longer. Supposedly I’m in a much better place now,i know it. I acknowledge that I have the best friends in the whole world, there is really good people that have my back and care about me but the truth is, i’m in a war with myself and I no longer know how to deal with them. I’m sorry. I don’t know what will happen to me in a short term but I really feel like I shoul leave here my gratification to those who, in the past year gave me more than i coul ever ask for. CG, HC, PG, MF, these four people always supported me and said to my face the things I needed to hear in the moments I was completly out of my mind, and they were the ones too, that gave me a hug or an advice when I was at my worst. I don’t know what will happen to me, but im sorry I made you lost your time. I’m not telling anyone that I’ll do something big, I’m just letting my feelings out. I’m doing what I can’t do with my friends because they would never get it, and because they have their own problems thatI’ll help them handle, before I leave