I have always been fascinated by flowers but that doesn't mean I have ever actively worked towards growing them. I'm pretty sure my mother would give a solid testimony on that. She would always ask, "If you do love flowers, aren't you supposed to love growing them and nurturing them as well? What kind of a person are you?" and to be completely honest, I don't know either.
It's not just garden flowers though, I love plants and flowers that are just wild and all over the place. It's like, they are not structured, there is no order to them, but still, they are extremely beautiful and wonderful. Reminds me of people who may not be the smartest or the richest or the most outgoing or stuff like that but still seems to have their life figured out. Guess it's not too bad to be among the wild flowers.
Its interesting how much effort actually does go into growing an immaculate garden. We see somebody's garden and go, "Well, that seems like a lot of time and effort and a huge amount of money all put together" and it's true. Just to give an idea - You have to decide on the perfect spot that will always be relevant and by that I mean that it should be useful to you as long as you stay in the game. Then you need to decide on the beautiful plants you want to nurture and most importantly, you have to identify the weed from the plants. That part is very tough because if not done carefully, might choke your entire garden.
Now, if you are an idiot like me and somehow managed to destroy your entire garden - Hello to you. I always wanted my garden to be filled with the most exotic, aromatic and beautiful flowers in the whole world but failed to consider their needs. That's right, plants have needs too. Shocking, I know.
The seeds I planted never took to flowering. They died. All of them. Then for a brief period of time I thought, maybe some wild flowers would grow there, you know, like what happens in nature.
But, I have realized now that no matter what you do, sometimes it just doesn't work. Like the seeds I planted. No matter how much I wished they would grow and thrive and flower, my wish alone just wasn't enough. Sometimes what you do is just not enough and that's the hard truth.
So what now? Stop gardening all together? To be fair, I thought about it. Long and hard. Didn't come to any solid conclusion. I mean, as long as I don’t analyze the soil type, the weather, the type of plants that could grow in this soil, the peculiarities of plants that I would like to grow(despite the geographical barriers), I don’t think there is going to be any progress.
As of now, I have decided to give it time. Time to heal itself. Time to grow any wild flowers if it wants to. Time to undo the damages inflicted upon it.
I will try to grow my garden again, make it flower all over again be filled with beauty. My mother is right - if you love it, then why not work for it?
Till then, I will cherish what once was.