Oblivion is the scariest thing that would come into our lives and there is something in existence closest to its manifestation: Depression.
Depression is in existence and its infecting everyone, one mind at a time. It is a growing disease with no cure or no hope to ever be cured. It is the feeling of emptiness, of constant despair and sadness. It is the feeling of almost being crushed underneath your own weight, or being choked by an invincible hand. It is the manifestation of nearing oblivion at every level.
Depression is one of the primary reasons for suicide. Depression kills people, it is a murderer and it’s good at it. It knows how to leave no trace behind, it knows how to cut loose ends, and it knows us better than ourselves.
We like to think of it as a battle, but in reality, it is a war. A war against an entity that we are bound to lose at some point in our lives, because inevitably, we all succumb. But as we live we will fight because that is what we are meant to do.
Fighting a war alone is unwinnable, but with help it could be possible and with knowledge we could inevitably, win. So let this article be your sword and shield against the coming oblivion.
Overthinking
There is a massive comorbidity with General Anxiety Disorder (GAD) and Major Depressive Disorder (MDD). The primary reason why anxiety usually connects to depression is overthinking.
People with GAD tend to overthink a lot, may it be their future, their past or their present. They make their mistakes look like it’s inevitable, and their future unreachable. Along the way they learn to blame themselves and think that life is just massive pile of unavoidable circumstances. They learn to be helpless and turn they become empty. Feeling of emptiness and long periods of despair and sadness is one of the primary symptoms of MDD.
Now, overthinking is not all a bad thing, we use it to perceive and plan out the future and learn from past mistakes. But overthinking almost every time that it becomes and forms into a habit is a problem and as a habit, it becomes hard to control.
One way to handle overthinking is to stop thinking about things that you cannot control. Another way to handle it is to simply think of the present instead of the future and the past. I know it’s hard because nothing ever good comes without a struggle. A battle cannot be won without sacrifice. But there is a way, an exercise that could help.
If you think too much of the future or too much past or even too much of your mistakes, just remember that you are here in the present, living and constantly growing, and all you need to do is breathe.
Inhale and exhale.
The past is already taken care of and the future will be better. All you need to do right now is to only breathe and take in everything in front of you.
Stand up while doing this. Breathe in, feel the air in your diaphragm and in your stomach for five seconds and breathe out. Let it out from your mouth. Do this for thirty seconds to a minute or so, depends how long you need. Feel that you are right here, right now.
Pessimism and Learned Helplessness
Pessimism and learned helplessness comes hand-in-hand, with one coming in first then evolves to the other.
Negativity is contagious. Everyone could do it, even you. Telling someone that they can’t do something is negative enough and once the person takes it internally they become pessimistic. First it’s You can’t do it, then it becomes I can’t do it, then finally, I can never do it. Learned helplessness is the idea that a person can’t do anything right and that there is nothing that could ever make them feel better, because they learn that in every situation, they would only feel pain and suffering. It’s like an animal stuck in a sinking hole, they just learn to give up and stop trying. They start to think that life is circumstantial and that life’s only purpose is to reach the inevitable doom. But that’s not true. Life is so much more than that.
Pessimism starts in an early age and learned helplessness is a developed form of it. Although pessimism branches out to other unhealthy coping habits, it usually reaches its true form when someone reaches a mature age.
One way to prevent this is to not tell children that they can’t do something. Word out what you’re trying to say and rephrase it, you could say something like: You might’ve not done it right today, but you can do it right tomorrow, or something along those lines. Another way to help prevent this is to increase self-esteem. Now this exercise is not as easy as the first one, but bear with me.
If you have a mirror and you’re afraid to see your face, then learn to see it more. Learn to smile at yourself and yes, that means smiling at the mirror. Learn to talk to yourself (this may sound crazy but it’s not). Talk to yourself in the mirror, ask yourself, how are you doing? Smile while you’re at it. This helps increase self-esteem and personal charisma along the way.
Learned optimism
This is the weapon of eradication against the upcoming war. It’s still on its prototype, but it will become our greatest weapon against the upcoming battles.
Learned optimism is a strategy and a weapon and it relies in one thing: Hope.
Hope fuels our everyday life, it fuels our desires and dreams, it fuels our soul. Take away food from a man then he would die after seven days, take away water, then he would die after two days, take away oxygen, then he would die in a minute, take away hope, then he would die in just a second. Being hopeful for the future and aspiring in the present empowers our very being, not as just mere individuals but as an entire species.
Remember that you are not alone in this battle, you are not the only one suffering in the battlefield, your comrades are here, willing to help you up when you fall and willing to take a bullet for you.
In the end
Oblivion is inevitable, it is going to come whether we like it or not, but we shouldn’t give up because our life entails so much more. We deserve to be happy, we deserve to be joyous and glorious, we deserve to feel warmth and accepted.
Now, nothing is ever easy. There is no battle that could be won without any sacrifices but we shouldn’t sit in the corner and just wilt and die out, we deserve to feel the sun shine, the rain splattering on our tired skin and devastated body. We have suffered for far too long and it is okay to rest and to let go sometimes, but don’t ever give up. The war is only beginning and at some point, it is going to be you who’s going to end it.
Remember that our legacy is not just written in the stars but also in our hearts as well, for as long as we hope for a brighter future, we will stand and live to get it.