THIS IS FOR YOU GOD ! sweet sadistic , vicious , brutal , selfish , greedy , hateful , merciless , violent , cold God
How come , how come people people fight for you , kill for you , stop themselves from living because of you , a fucking stupid illusion , an indifferent thought that runs through everyone's veins , and torture every single person living , and every funcking creature , that has to deal with people who believe in you ... How come people have hope and faith , in such a disgusting thing , how come i did once ?
i hate you , it's that simple to say , see i hate you when you don't even exist , i hate you and you tear the inside of me ,and it scares the shit out of me , it hurts the living crap out of me . See it's been over a year and i've been thinking ,i couldn't say a word because i was lost , still lost in the beauty that the world has to offer , lost in how much greatness , and kindness life surprises me with sometimes ,and all i could do is give you credit for all these beautiful things that accrued to me at the time ... and then i came to a point where i blamed you for every fucked up thing in life ! well i still do , i don't blame you though , i blame the idea of you .
just when you're done with believing , Not believing ... you come to the point where you doubt , see here's the thing , i like doubting in things , it makes me feel safe , and avoid taking sides and decision in my life , that might influence Me over all . i doubted for quiet a long time ... My doubt has ended an Hour ago . i decided .