Midnight

"Thank you for your patronage!"

I heard the man from the bar say as I pulled the door shut behind me.

"Man, I had a good drink. What do we do? The trains have stopped running."

Maybe I drank a little too much. The world seemed to be slightly spinning, but I can stand and walk so I guess everything's good. I looked ahead at my companion who was standing at the edge of the street, waiting for the light to turn green. I draped my arm around him.

"Hey, did you have fun? You were silent this whole time! Did you have enough to drink? Hey! Are you listening?"

I stared at him. His blue button-down shirt that looked like all his other button down shirt. His faded jeans just like all his other faded jeans. And that scarf. That annoying scarf which he uses to cover half his face. Up until his nose so that only his eyes show.

Argh. I want to tear it off him so bad, that scarf. The same old red and black plaid scarf which he uses every time we go out. Every single time. It was just my luck that we became friends during these cold months so he does have an excuse to use it. But damn, I can't see his face that much because of it.

Well, I do see him at school, but he always has this poker face plastered on him. The only reason a slacker like me and a scholar like him who are both from different majors would meet was because we were both forced to become reps for a certain university Christmas event. And from then on, I just couldn't leave him alone.

I invited him out on several random occasions, and he does humor me once in a while, though I don't know if he accepted because he wanted to or just to shut me up. Probably the latter.

And this one drinking session took me a week, two apple pies and three stationary sets just to make him say yes.

"Hey, are you alright? You've been silent ever since you downed that first glass. Well, truth be told you are always silent, but you were really silent this time. Hey, you wouldn't even look at me. Is it that bad, how you much you don't want to hang out with me?"

I felt his shoulders tense as if in surprise. His eyes behind his round-rimmed glasses widened. He turned to look at me but changed his mind halfway and returned his gaze to the other side of the road.

"-eavy."

"What?"

"You're... heavy..."

The light turned green as I realized that I've been leaning heavily on him and in my haste, I retrieved my arm around him but the sudden action made me lose my balance. I closed my eyes and before I knew it, I had hit the pavement.

"Wha--? Are you alright?"

I opened my eyes and saw his face above mine, his eyes full of worry. I could feel my face getting hot. It must be the alcohol.

"Yeah, I'm fine, I guess. Just lost my balance there."

He started backing up a little. Maybe it was curiosity, or maybe it was because I was a bit drunk, but that scarf was really getting on my nerves. So as he backed up, I pulled it down, revealing a surprised face.

I was stunned. This was the first time I have seen any kind of expression from him aside from his usual poker face.

It was... familiar.

"Wha-? What are you doing?," he said, panicking, pulling the scarf from my grip.

"Arrghh. Come on. Why do you always hide your face with that damn cloth. It's hard enough that you don't talk that much, but with that, I couldn't read your expressions at all. I have exactly no idea what you're thinking!"

He stopped struggling. He hung his head. I was feeling a bit guilty about shouting at him, but it can't be helped. What's done is done. I guess we both don't know what to do, so we just stayed there, me sitting on the ground while he knelt a few feet from me as the light turned red once more.

In the end, I sighed. I blew it. I blew every other chance of me hanging out with him.

Wait. Why am I even thinking about this now?

My heart ached at the thought that may be the last time we'd hang out. Well, at least I could catch glimpses of him at university.

Woah, wait a minute. Why would I want to even see him? I sound like I like him or something.

I like him.

I stifled a laugh. So that was it. No wonder I had the patience the stick with him for this long when I couldn't even last an hour-long lecture.

Well, I guess that's that. So much for my short-lived love.

I looked at him. He hung his head, gripping the scarf in his hands but he wasn't pulling. I realized that I was still holding on to the other end.

I stood up which seemed to have snapped him back to reality. I walked over to where he was and wrapped the annoying thing around his neck and let go.

"Yow, sorry I yelled at you. I didn't mean to. Guess it was the alcohol."

He turned to look up at me and his face was even more surprised than when I yanked his scarf.

I reached out my hand to help him stand up. He grabbed it and as he was helping himself up, I said,

"You know, you could've just told me outright that you didn't want to hang with me. It's cool. I mean, I'd get it. Who'd want to hang out with me anyway?"

"No!"

I stared at him in surprise. His grip also tightened. He was staring at the ground but when he looked at me, his face showed a look of frustration.

For a guy who always seems to have a straight face, his expressions change easily, not to mention that they are very easy to read. He seemed to be struggling to find the right words as he still held my hand. Being me, I just stood there, with my hand out, waiting for him to speak.

I looked around to find that we were the only ones around caught a glimpse of the light turning green again. Suddenly, he sighed with his head still down.

"You... You really don't remember?"

What? What on earth is talking about? Did they have a test tomorrow that he told me about? Maybe he was mad because I still forced him to go with me even though he had to study. But, no, we rarely talk about academics since we're from different majors and I don't exactly bring it up since I suck at it. Come on, brain, think.

"What are you talking about?"

Way to go.

He looked straight at me, this time his face was showing a sort of embarrassed expression. I could feel that he wanted to look away, but he steeled himself not to.

Then again, I wonder why I could read him so easily. His expressions reveal too much.

He took a deep breath then started speaking.

"Thi-- This scarf. You're the one... You're the one who gave it to me."

Ok, he lost it. I have absolutely no memory of him and me speaking before the preparations for the event started, much less having to have given him something.

And I guess, from the stupid look on my face, he can tell that I have no idea what he was talking about.

"Well, I can't blame you. It.. It was a long time ago. We were in high school back then."

"High school? Did we go to the same one?"

"No, we didn't. But one day, I was on my way home from a convenience store when a group of bullies from your school approached me. I was scared. I tried to fake it but my expression gave me away."

He glanced at me for a second then he continued.

"I tried to run. But they caught me by the hem of my scarf. I was so scared and pulled hard but it was in vain. Then you came. You knocked them all senseless. It seemed that you had had a lot of fights even before."

"Oh, yeah. I was a bit of a delinquent back in high school."

You're not a delinquent.

Huh? Where did that come from?

Then I remembered.

After beating the hell of those guys, I approached the boy who was their target. He was close to crying as he looked at his torn scarf.

"Sorry 'bout that. Are you alright?"

He stared at me with a surprised expression. The same expression he wore when I pulled his scarf. That's why I thought it was familiar.

"Woah, sorry. I won't do anything. Guess, being saved by a delinquent isn't all that good, huh?"

"You're... You're not a delinquent."

"What?"

"Delinquents... don't go about saving people. You.. saved me."

I stared at him. Then I smiled.

"You're a weird kid. Here have this, it ain't new but you can use it replace that torn scarf of yours."

"Wha-- What? Why? How about you?"

"Don't worry about me. You should take care of yourself more. Did anybody tell you that you're too easy to read? You're expressions reveal too much and that may have been the cause why you're bullied. Hide'em a bit, will yah?"

Once again, his face showed worry then relief. Then he smiled a smile so bright, it was almost blinding.

"I'll try my best. Wh- Wait!"

But I had already run off.

So that was what it was. I remember now.

"Don't... Don't tell me you've been keeping a straight face all this time because of what I told you?"

His showed shock and embarrassment at the same time like I just found out one of his secrets.

Wait, don't tell me that was it.

"I wanted to thank you properly but I didn't know anything about you aside from your school. And... I was afraid.. of going there because the bullies might come back at me... I was a coward..."

He averted his gaze as his expression changed to something that of regret. And, was that, frustration? Then suddenly, his expression softened and he showed a slight smile.

"When I found out that we were in the same university, I couldn't believe it. But then, I saw you in the hallway one day and I knew it was you."

Then he looked at me. And he smiled. It was one of those smiles that just dazzles people.

"I was so happy."

Looking at him was like watching a slideshow of emotions. It was fun and interesting. And I think I was liking him even more with every new expression he shows.

"But then you didn't recognize me. Even when we spoke at the rep meeting. I thought that the reason you approached me was because you remembered me but based on your words you had no idea who I was."

"Then why didn't you say anything at all? And here I was wondering if you hated me or what."

He blushed and looked away. And he looked annoyed.

"That's because... I was a bit angry at you for not recognizing me."

I laughed. That expression was just too cute was what I thought as I pulled him into a hug.

"That is so adorable."

"Don't... Don't call me adorable. And... you're... you're hugging me."

I pulled away quickly realizing what I just did.

"Sorry about that. But you were just too cute. I couldn't help. It was your fau--"

I couldn't believe it. He was blushing so hard. His whole face up to his ears were all red. And when he saw me looking, he blushed even harder.

"Don't look at me!"

He said as he buried his face in my shirt. This time, I think I turned as red as he was.

"Oh-. Oyy."

He tensed up, realizing what he just did, but he didn't break away.

"I-- I am not hugging because I want to, ok? I just didn't want you to see my face like this."

I laughed as I hugged him back.

"If you say so."

And we stayed like that for a few more moments.

--

As the lights turned green, we crossed the street and headed for my place.

Hey, clear out your thoughts. My place turned out to be nearer, he was just staying there until the trains start running again. And I have a good grip on my desires, you know.

"But seriously, you really didn't recognize me?"

He had stopped walking a few step ahead of me so I couldn't read his expression.

"No, sorry... But... You had square-rimmed glasses then, and you're wearing round-rimmed ones now. So I thought you were a different person."

"What the heck is up with that?" he said as he turned to face me. I could barely describe the face he was wearing but it was like he was stopping himself from laughing and trying his best to look irritated.

I walked up to him and hugged him.

"Oh, why does it matter? At least I knew that I got to fall in love with the same person again."

"Wha-?! What!?"

I smiled while I stroked his hair. It was soft.

"Actually, back then. I was watching you. When you came out of that convenience store. You looked so happy. So pure. I was taken in by your expression. And when you smiled at me after I saved you, I was sold. In my panic to get away before my expression gave me away, I forgot to ask for your name. And you weren't in your uniform so I didn't know your school either."

He remained silent. I didn't need to look at his face to know what he looked right now.

"Hey, think you can still keep a straight face in school?"

"Why?"

"Your expressions... I don't want anyone else seeing them. You're not allowed to show them to anyone else."

He remained silent but I felt his hands behind my back, returning my embrace.

"Idiot."

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08/06/17 3:48 pm || 12/27/2017 11:00 am

Photograph my Athena Marcelo.