Our love... With a pinch of thoughts

At night,  I usually use to cover myself under the  warmer and use to ponder am I that ugly, that he doesn't wants me to be by his side?

Am I that dusky, because of which he doesn't give a damn on me?

Am I that fat, because of which he compares me among those skiny girls?

Am I that boring, because of which he use to cancel all the plans since it may be boring if he goes with me?

But then I conclude with this...
May be I pondered too much,  there's nothing like that.

But then...

Okay !
Not my thoughts are wrong, But his mentality is.

Because he never gave a fucking importance to my words.
But if he did he would have know what an amazing person I am to be with.