Pastels and Fading

What does it do to you? Other than taking everything that contains you inside? There's more to the blue skies beneath me, it deep-freezes me in the winter of my sultry. The vast oceans undulates my inner thoughts, goes along with the current of my complacence, it is me in the deep waters that no one knows what my surface looked like. The blue waters buries me into my deepest colors Ive been stuck for a long time. If there's something that describes sadness, it wouldnt have been a word. It would've been something thats ineffable, oddly inexquisite, ingenous in an image's subtleness, something as hard as holding back myself not to cry. It would've been something that lived within me a long time ago. They're the monsters that lived inside me that i refused to fight back, bc if i do i get impaled with my own swords that i lay on them.

If hapiness was a choice, i have wondered for long why my heart chose not to feel it. Maybe bc its not meant to be taught how to feel, its meant to be understood and perceived just the way it is. So we feel everything we need to feel, hold our stance on the edge of our cliff, drag our stones tied to us until we don't feel that it was once tied to our feet any longer. Pluck every chord that strucks us everytime. These are the currents the runs through our veins that has escaped to notice but will always be kept as a part of our celestial being. Because there's no word for sadness, if there was, it wouldn't have been.