puppy love

I slipped away.

I was spiralling down.

I was alone.

You saw me.

You reached out for me.

You bought me back.

Now you hold me tight so i cannot slip out again.

And every now and then, when i feel lost, i open my eyes to see you sleeping next to me, holding me tight, making sure i do not go away.

I feel safe again.

You make me wonder if we really need to run away from attachment, if what i kept doing all my life wasn’t necessary, because being attached to you was probably the best thing that ever happened to me.

It makes me believe everything will be fine.

Because everything is fine when i meet you at the end of a rough day. You make me laugh as much as i almost never do.

But attachment is the best feeling in the world only while it is still with you, when it leaves, it just leaves you banging at doors looking for something to be attached to. But that is what led me to you. You opened your door when i was wildly banging on it, like someone was behind me. But i was banging because no one was. Not behind me, not beside me. Nowhere. It’s like a drug, when they take you off it, you will go to any extent just to have one whif.

You give me hope that i would never have to bang on doors again, that you will never leave me. And i know you don’t lie. So i don’t think about what will happen next. I live in this moment. This moment where i can hold you, and listen to your heartbeat, and give you food, sleep with you, tickle your neck while you drive, kiss you when you sleep, play with your hair and make you look like a mushroom, assure you im not crying when you check my eyes for tears.

You make me feel like a puppy, a puppy who sits at the doorstep all day, waiting for his only friend to come back. Because puppy knows no one else cares about him as much. They all thinks he’s cute, they play with him, they take care of him, enjoy with him. But only his friend knows what puppy is comfortable in, that he does not like it when someone blows in his ear, that he likes it when someone pets his neck. You know everything. So puppy will wait at that doorstep till you come back because no one else deserves to know everything. Because puppy loves you.