THE SILENT DESPERATION

You know what I mean when I say that there is nothing more cruel than obvious rejection. The kind where the guy you like doesn't reciprocate what you feel. Something like that happened to me and I want you to know reader that it SUCKS! I hate the fact that I still stalk the damn schitck's on facebook because I am just like any other girl. I liked a guy for two and half years and the only reaction he could muster up was "Oh :0". Like really that is what he wrote. Un-freaking-believable,isn't it? The worst part is that I still haven't gotten over. It's not easy. I know this is just some stupid rant for you and when you probably read it you will probably go like "Hey, another ditched and rejected ninny ranting it out here and irritating the hell out of me". But let me ask you something. Can you say with full confidence that you have never experienced this? Can you even boast about the fact that yes, when I got the first opportunity to talk to my crush, I confessed to him/her? Can you accept the fact that even you felt rejected and sad for the fact that you spent a little amount of those emotions on someone who didn't accept them? I did. And I am still trying. Yes, there are days when I feel like smashing the living daylights out of every girl he ever talks to fools around with but there are days that I stand in the crowd and still stand out just for the sheer fact that I experienced something like that. Yes, there will be a day (hopefully,finger crossed) that I will be the one on the other side or maybe when someone truly likes my weird habits and me as a whole (and rather forget the part about me being fat!), I think it would ever change the fact that "he" was my first crush and that probably I will never overcome that weird jumpy feeling when I first met him. It 'll probably always be there. Maybe someday we all get lucky with someone who 'll make us forget that(God, send him already!!).