Stay

The only thing you had to do was stay.
I don't know how to put words into this. I'm broken. All from within. Its not the lonely kind of broken. Its not the suicidal broken. Its the all lost and don't know where to go and what to do kind of broken. And this is all because of you. Do you remember the first time you asked me out? Do you remember how you came up to me asking if the pen that was lying on the ground was mine? I remember. I remember every bit of it. You probably don't. I remember how you walked up to me for the first time looking at the VANS of mine, you were so freaking nervous, weren't you?
You were different, at least I thought so. But no, I was wrong. I was so wrong. I gave you everything that you said I should. I gave up everything. Even  my parents. I gave up my house. I gave up my job. I gave up all my savings. To do what? To be with you, all the time. To get high with you, all the time. To be, who you wanted me to be. And what did you do?
You loved me, like nobody else did before. You made me know how it felt to be high. So damn high. It started with cigarettes and love, and ended, well, ended with the last syringe mark on your left forearm and love.
I don't know, why, why I'm writing this now. Its not like, someday this will reach you. Not like someday, you will realize what wrong you did. Not like, someday we will be again together. Or, will we? I wanted this to last forever. That is if forever exists at all. We made promises. Sacred we called them. Hatred's not my thing, you know. I'm just sad and so angry. I could have stopped everything. I could have saved you.
But you left anyway, didn't you?
I loved you. I still do. Will always do. Will meet you soon, Mrs High. Take care, up above. I'm leaving this letter right here above your beautiful grave near the flowers left by your mom.

Yours forever,
Mr High.