Surrender

Just that one moment of vulnerability - of surrender- when you let yourself feel it again for the last time before closing it completely. Like after fighting so hard and finally coming to a freeing time where you accept it all and decide you're gonna be okay from now on, there's still that part of you that asks, are you? Will you? And then you give yourself that final leeway to feel it all again, for the last time, just to get it all out of your system for good ... and then you feel it. You let yourself cry and cry and scream and let it all out - snot, tears, throat closing, shoulders shaking, knees weakening and just all the rawness of it. And because now that it's not just a bodily reaction anymore or even a force you either fight or give into, it's all good. It was your decision now, you deserve it and so you give it to yourself. For this one last time, you surrender to it before picking yourself back up together and finally ending it, finally moving on.