'The Festive Visit that wasn't Celebrative'

You know how it feels!!??

That wait of the heavy rain to stop, when you sit inside the house craving to go out.. But you can't for it's raining cats and dogs.

That wait of hot chapatis on the dining after a long tiring day.. But you gotta wait until everyone's back.

That wait of result after long mouthful of exams that decide your future admissions and goals.. But you can't help but sit there restlessly.

That wait of the farmer to chop his crops after cultivating them for months.. But he can't, for they aren't ripe yet.

And STAYING AWAY FROM YOU and LONGING for that one moment to be close to you,to see you & hear your voice is that kind of WAIT.

This wait is soo killing me with every second that passes,but finally the text arrives- "I'll meet you", the so awaited moment will be here, When you'll be here on the holi break..

When the sun will shine bright after a heavy downpour, The chapatis will be snatched and relished together, The result will be out & one will have tears of joy in those eyes, When the crops will be cut and sold for the desirable prices.

And it's more joyous, more festive, more content, more worth of that wait.. So I can't sum it up in words as to how it feels to know that you gonna be here but can just hope that my heart doesn't pound out, my eyes don't stop blinking and my my throat doesn't choke having you around.

Wondering how you look now and how would you find me, how this gonna be and how it'll all feel. While I wondered the moment was here - 'A knock at the door'..

My heart throbbing, hands trembling.. I rushed to the door to open the door of my world, to let my heartbeat in bring life to it... Ah nothing changed your presence still feels the same and makes me Lively & Beautiful.

While I was trying to live it all and capture these moments in my heart.. You gave me a strange glance, It made me nervous, for this was something else.. while i stood there curious and clueless You said - "Come here, sit next to me".

I refused knowing that the minute that arrives isn't holding something pleasant for me.. And you forced saying you wanted to show something.. Gaining all the strength that I could, I walked up to you with a storm building within me.. You held up the phone to me that displayed a new unknown face, and said - "She's the one for me, found her while I was out there"...

My heart sank, I sat there frozen, Totally numb, As if someone just shattered my home of dreams, Not knowing how to react.. Just Tryin to get back to my senses I barely faked a smile, and mumured- 'She's Nice'.

But is it really all nice?? Is this what I've been waiting for? Is it how it was meant to be? Was this what I had hopes for? Was this the end? Didn't you know what I felt for you?

All these questions remained unanswered.. I couldn't confront you anymore.. but you should have known this, I guess!!?? BUT NOW You'll never know and I'll never show.. Just don't know how things gonna be from now on.. Will I be okay.. Will I be the same with you.. Will things be any better!!??

I just don't know but this day which was assumed to be festive wasn't a celebrative one for me!!!