The Last Friend Standing

I am a depressed person with friends living a normal life. How could I categorize my life something out of the normal? I'm not abnormal for sure. But I'm sure as hell my life is.

Before having this, I was a very bubbly person with a bubbly personality. I get along with a lot of people. I have a lot of friends, a lot of connections. But things have changed since this depression took over me. From being a confident person to someone who lacks one. I just couldn't deal with people well anymore and that caused me to having such a small group of friends. Although I may still be in contact with most, but that small circle I have are the ones I really rely on. And out of that small circle, there's only one person that I really trust the most... and that's you, P.

But you broke me. Of all the people you were the one I trusted the most but I feel betrayed. You telling the guy I love what I feel about him because you think I'm helpless. You think you did that for my sake, for him to do something about my condition. You think that was the best for me that if you could shake him up and tell you that he feels the same way about me, you think that could make me feel better and just get rid of this depression?

No. You just made things worse.

You may fight me on this but you did not help me. Even if that was your pure intention, it did not help me in any way. All you did was embarrass me. Telling him how I felt about him without my consent? I never knew you could go way out of the line. Call me close minded, fine. But really, you were the one who disrespected me here. You were the one who made my privacy an open book. I FUCKING TRUSTED YOU.

You were the person I trusted the most about my depression. You were the ONLY person I wanted to open up to about how I felt about having this. All the struggles and pain that I've been experiencing, all those I thought you would've understood. I thought you would never judge me and stick with me 'til the end.

But again, no. You gave up on me.

You were the last person to trust. And that leaves me with nothing.